At one point Arizona held a 24-10 lead, but that is deceptive. The Cardinals' offense was absolutely no factor in this game, which is kind of a shame because their defense forced three Vikings' turnovers, and their kick-off guy ran one back. In fact, the Cardinals kick-off return specialist almost put up more yards (198) than the entire Cardinals offense (225). The Vikes led in time of possession 38-22, and in yards from scrimmage 507-225.

Megamind is a hit. Although it started tentatively on Friday by virtually tying for first with Due Date, it soared on the weekend with family audiences. It grossed $47.6M for the weekend, hitting Weekend Warrior's projection ($47.4) just about on the nose.

Mr. Warrior's predictions did well in general. He predicted $32.6 for Due Date and that film grossed $33.5. He predicted $23.3 for For Colored Girls, and that film came in at $20.1.

All three films have to be considered successful.

By the way, Megamind ended up with a pretty respectable score on Rotten Tomatoes - 67%. The other two new films finished below 40%.

Well, they were playing in Salt Lake City, so they had the home field advantage!

The good news for Utah - they move into a different conference next year - one without TCU.

TCU certainly showed that they were a credible #3 by slaughtering the #5 team, but Auburn and Oregon both won big (62-24 and 53-16), so TCU can't move up.

While the top four were all winning by 35-40 points, they are now the only four undefeated teams, so the only interesting question for next week is "Who will be #5?"

#5 Utah was massacred by TCU

#6 Alabama lost

#7 Nebraska barely hung on to beat an unrated team by one point.

#8 Oklahoma lost to Texas A&M by two touchdowns.

Those results seem to indicate that next week's #5 team could be either #9 Wisconsin or #10 LSU, which pulled out a big win over Alabama. I think Wisconsin will go to #5 in the two human polls, because they were #7 this week, and the two teams above them lost. The BCS rankings are another story because of the computer factor. The computers already liked LSU a lot more than Wisconsin before this week, and the win over Alabama will further accentuate LSU's edge

I think your bet is pretty safe if you took the "over" on that game. If Jason Ford had rushed for 9 more yards, Illinois would have had three hundred-yard rushers in one game - in a freakin' loss! By the way, here's a puzzler for ya: the same Jason Ford averaged 9.1 yards per carry, with a long gain of 9 yards!

Here's how it happened: Ford had a run of 62 yards on a lateral from another back who had previously gained two yards. Apparently that run DOES count in his total rushing yards, but does NOT get figured in his long gain. I didn't know it was supposed to be scored that way. Precisely WHY it gets scored that way is a mystery which can't be explained, kinda like the popularity of Rosie O'Donnell.

All three new films did quite well. Megamind and Due Date finished in a virtual tie for first, and For Colored Girls equaled them in terms of revenues per theater, thus finishing a strong third.

It's not as stupid as it sounds.

They use different boxes of drugs to train police dogs. Obviously they label them so the humans know which box is which.

But, OK, it's still pretty stupid.

Quote of the day "there are no ethical standards at MSNBC"

Since he was donating to liberals, I'm thinking he'll probably have to go 2-3 minutes without pay.

He will be taking with him every single person who voted for him, and they will all be staying in five-star accommodations with an open bar, except Joe Biden, who will be staying at the Mumbai Red Roof Inn. Also accompanying Obama will be the entire U.S. Navy. That isn't too expensive for the Mumbai visit, but the side trip to New Delhi will get a little expensive because New Delhi is something like 600 miles from the nearest port, so millions of workers will be paid premium rates to dig an enormous canal for the American warships. Oh, those will be Indian workers, so the president will create no jobs for Americans. Oh, and by the way, that canal will be lined with gold. Gold, I tells ya!

The Spanish drinking age is technically 18, but it's largely unenforced.

The key question for Miley is this - how long will it take her after her 18th birthday (Nov 23rd) before she has some of her private parts on the internet? She certainly seems to want the record, but it will be almost impossible for her to set it. Emma Watson chose to show the world her stuff right after her birthday party, so if Miley wants the record, she'll have to wake up on her birthday, go to the window immediately, throw open the curtains, and flash that stuff in the morning.

I have noticed that David Cross looks exactly like Allen Ginsberg.

I never noticed before that Justin Bieber looks exactly like Kim Darby, but they nailed it! Other cool ones: Harry Potter and composer Dmitri Shostakovich; Brian Wilson and King Leonidas; Vincent Van Gogh and David Caruso.

Five million simoleans to be the A&W Root Bear? Seems a tad pricy.

Because nothing represents the spirit of Christian love like an old cantankerous Jewish guy who hates everything!

I'm tempted, but I think I'm going to wait for bin Laden's Christmas book.

And coffin sales are going through the roof ground!

Couldn't you accomplish the same thing with a Kirstie Alley cannonball?

"An angry dispute that ended with a local man being charged with a felony aggravated assault began when he and the woman he was with threw a muffin at each other"

Leno and Letterman are already dying slowly, and the process ain't gonna get any slower Monday, when Conan returns.

At the moment I can't confirm or refute the ID.

Animal rights organisation PETA has condemned a shocking animal slaughter calendar which shows a topless model chopping the head off a pig.

The calendar's creators are ambivalent about the reaction to their project. On the one hand, their problems are not just with PETA; even sensible people condemn them as sociopaths. On the other hand, Eli Roth offered them millions for the movie rights.

"You may be thinking of skipping this video, but in the end Hulk Hogan takes his cock out in front of his daughter, so why on earth would you want to. "

Interestingly enough, Sparky also looked 76 when I was in college, forty years ago. It seems impossible to believe that he was actually 36 then, when he took the job managing the Reds. Man, he was one grizzled sumbitch.

Sparky was the first manager ever to manage a World Series champ in each league, so he knew his baseball. Two of this teams, the '76 Reds and the '84 Tigers, are considered among the all-time greats. He also was widely known to reporters as the gabbiest and nicest guy you could possibly interview. The only problem in interviewing him was figuring out how to get out of his office once he started talking. Some guys in the spotlight are fake - nice and approachable until the light is off of them - but Sparky was genuine. He acted exactly the same with all people in all social situations.

He is generally credited with inventing the five-man rotation. In the mid-seventies, he was the first successful manager to start using his starters on four days rest instead of three.

I read this article because I thought the headline was kinda confusing.

It seems that ‘Battleship Bob,’ who sails a catamaran powered by a skull and crossbones sail, has become embroiled in a long-standing dispute with rowers who are harming the vicious Mr Asbo.

So you see, the headline's author got it all in a nutshell.

They're lucky to be in Michigan. In Texas that would carry the death penalty.

Although the good news is that fiberglass animal head theft qualifies one to have a celebrity pull the switch. I have to look it up, but I think the specific celebrity who kills you for a giraffe head theft is Vanna White. Too bad it wasn't a Springbok. Tony Danza does that one!

By the way, Calvin College??? Wasn't that the president after Warren Harding. Are their teams the "Silent Cals"?

I guess that would be OK, except for the debate team.

(With a pic)

"Thus it becomes vital to instill a sense of confidence in your co-workers that you are not only more important than you actually are, but also worth more than your already bloated paycheck. There are two ways to accomplish this:

1. Bust your ass working, use your downtime to come up with creative new ways to help the company, and foster meaningful connections with your coworkers

2. Spout gibberish until they go away.

Since most office workers go for the latter option, management speak has become an indispensable way to make carrying out even the most mundane or despicable tasks look like you're this generation's John D Rockefeller."

"From the late 30's to the early 70's, the teal blue roof was as famous then as the golden arches are today. Sadly, in the late 70's, the empire began to dwindle when Stuckey's was purchased by a large corporation and became trapped in a time warp. Of the 350-plus locations operating in our heyday, the number dropped to fewer than 75. But that was then, and this is now. Now, with a Stuckey back at the helm and over 200 franchised locations on the interstate highways spanning 19 states from Pennsylvania to Florida in the east and to Arizona in the west, we're going to be bigger and better than ever."

The answer to that question is not clear, but MySpace is bleeding red ink and losing traffic. Seth Meyers hit the nail on the head when he referred to it as "The internet's abandoned amusement park."

Because it's OK to SAY you are Christian, but do not, at any time, actually try to behave like Christ. All that namby-pamby, sandals-wearin', forgivin', neighbor-lovin', cheek-turnin' is downright un-American!

"A man dressed as Jesus was kicked out of a St. Louis area church Sunday. Police were even called to get in the middle of the spiritual showdown. "We're called to be ambassadors for Jesus Christ, ambassadors should represent, and that's what I do. I try to represent my Lord and savior Jesus Christ," said Neal Thompson Monday night, wearing the same white robe and cross, and carrying the same staff he's been using every Sunday for 22 years. He dresses up like Jesus every week, going to a new church every week, he says, to spread his Christian message."

I dunno. I think if he looks back over his notes, he can find a lot worse moments than that. In fact, that was one of his good days. It actually got people who were not fans to defend him.

Besides, Kanye never said Bush was a racist in the first place. He just said Bush didn't care about black people. That would only make Bush racist if he DID care about non-black people.
I feel confident that Bush would have been just as bumbling and unresponsive to a similar disaster happening to poor white people in Utah or poor Hispanics in South Texas. Color didn't matter to him. It's good to remember that incompetence and insensitivity are not the same as racism.

Only one question: when did Harry Hamlin die? There was nothing about it in the papers.

(He's supposed to be Ricky Ricardo, but I'm thinking that the real Desi Arnaz, although dead nearly 25 years, still looks better than this.)

From the reviews, it appears that these films range from tepid to crappy.

Due Date is the Downey/Galfianakis mismatched buddy film. The trailer makes it seem as if they are trying to channel Steve Martin and John Candy in Planes, Trains & Automobiles. Only 43% positive reviews. One critic called it "The year's least amusing comedy," which is really saying something in a year which included Sex and the City 2.

Megamind is yet another super-villain spoof. If Due Date seems like a rip-off of Planes, Trains and Automobiles, this one seems to be a rip-off of Despicable Me. Reviews are so-so: 56% positive. Based on the reviews I read, my guess is that your kids will probably enjoy it and you will not find it unpleasant to sit through.

For Colored Girls is Tyler Perry's 312th project this year. What a slacker! Oh, well, he still has two more months to reach the magic 400 mark. Or maybe it just seems like that many. At least he doesn't play any of the titular girls. 22% positive reviews. Sample: "For Colored Girls's undiluted hysteria would be completely obscene if it weren't so unintentionally hilarious."

If you live in a big city, you can probably catch Fair Game, Doug Liman's film about the Valerie Plame affair. (She's the CIA agent who was outed, allegedly as part of a plot to discredit her husband, who had criticized the Bush administration for lying about WMD.) It has pulled 79% positive reviews, but it will only be in 35 theaters this week, and you should beware of that score. Liberal sermon movies tend to score high, no matter how bad they are. The hilariously awful The Interpreter scored 58%, so that's probably the lowest score you'll ever see for such a film. Given that the scores can really only range from 58 to 100, Fair Game has scored 21 points out of the 42 within that range of possibility, which would be like scoring 50% in a genre where the full range from 0 to 100 is possible.

Looks like the Warrior is really bullish on this weekend, despite tepid-to-crappy reviews for the new films. He's predicting that the top 12 will take in more than $140 million. During last year's comparable weekend (Nov 6-8), the take was only $106 million. There are three new movies. He predicts the following:

Megamind: #1; $46 million in 3500 theaters.

Due Date: #2; $32 million in 3200 theaters.

For Colored Girls:$3; $24 million in 2100 theaters.

You can see from a quick gaze at the numbers that he's expecting For Colored Girls to take in more per theater than Due Date.

Based on the hype for "Dancing With the Stars" and "Skating With the Stars," Scoopy Productions is rolling out its own similar show targeted at the same audience. We have decided to skip all the euphemisms and just go with "Gay Sex With the Stars."

Doesn't it always?

Why is this "news"

Good point.

I learned from this article that "tranny" is a taboo word and a "derogatory slur." I reckon I'm out of touch on the latest lingo, because I thought that word was a neutral abbreviation.

Because of a legal nicety, Cousin Eddie himself is not affected by this particular order.

Give him time.

Which means the only state where he can vote is Illinois.

Major points:

The House will be overwhelmingly Republican. CNN estimates that the final total will be 243-192, but the official result could vary slightly.

The Democrats will hold the Senate. Barely. 37 seats were at risk and it appears that the Republicans will win 24 or 25 of those, including either the official Republican or the write-in Republican in Alaska. That sounds overwhelming on the surface, but that margin is not large enough to change control of the upper house. It looks like their net gain will be about six seats. The most notable Democrat to be defeated was Wisconsin's Russ Feingold, who has been in the Senate for 18 years.

Californians rejected Prop 19. Marijuana will not be legalized. Two other states rejected medical marijuana.

Many governor's races are still too close to call, but the Republicans are now standing at +8, having gained ten states and lost two.

Trivia: I learned from this that Downey and Sheen went to high school together! Strange how it turned out. Sheen is the one with the sensible father and Downey is the one whose dad was always a ... let's say a free spirit.

"A senior at Hamilton-Wenham Regional High School was suspended for two days last week after the 17-year-old dressed as a knight and took a three-minute tour on his family’s horse around the school. A friend who dressed as a squire and led the horse by the reins was given a one-day suspension and two hours community service.

"They told my son it's the equivalent of bringing in a loaded firearm to school" Ron DePaolis, the teenager's father said today in a telephone interview. But he "brought the spirit up of the student body. The kids need that, a little boost in the morale."

The Pats and Ravens took the 1-2 spots. The former 1-2 teams (Steelers and Jets) dropped to 3-4.

Unfortunately, it's a slide show.

It's required for a B.S. degree.

That's booty in the sense of "loot."

"A PLAN by former Baywatch star Pamela Anderson to donate her $25,000 Playboy cover shoot fee to a charity that helps Indonesian disaster victims has been condemned by a hardline Islamic group. But the Islamic Defenders Front on Monday told Indonesia's Metro TV that the donation to the charity - which works to bring clean drinking water to disaster hit zones - would be "against the law of God" because it was obtained through 'immoral acts.'"

Can't blame 'em

The midterm elections have been compared to a circus and politicians to clowns, which has caused some offense - to clowns. Kinko the (Copying?) Clown says, "You'll find that circuses are one of the most efficient and well-run industries in America. Before you call anyone in Washington a clown, consider that clowns make people happy."

By the way, as I consider NPR's web site, I'm thinking maybe we aren't giving them that much funding after all. (Or else they're just pocketing it all.) They obviously can't pay anyone to write code or create graphics. These guys make Matt Drudge look like Mr. Page-design.

The Top Ten Signs Your Candidate Is Not Gonna Win...

10. He's a member of "The Rent Is Too Damn Low" Party.

9. He just conceded to a fire hydrant.

8. He spent all his campaign funds playing Three Card Monty.

7. Whenever people ask him his qualifications, he just unzips his pants.

6. He launched a series of negative attack ads against himself.

5. Has been forced to deny that she's a witch, a communist or a Carrot Top fan.

4. His last stump speech took place on an actual stump.

3. What he calls "a motorcade" most people would call "a Big Wheel dragging tin cans behind it."

2. His campaign headquarters are located inside a Fotomat.

1. His motto: "No we can't."

Damn, first Perez Hilton, now Keith Olbermann! Have we passed "peak douchebag," only to face a future with a critical douchebag shortage? I believe that President Obama may soon have to allow us to tap into the nation's precious strategic douchebag reserve.

Although, to be fair, Olbermann sounded like an douchebag when he made that announcement, so there may still be hope.

"During tonight's Countdown, Keith Olbermann made a major announcement: effective immediately, he's suspending the show's 'Worse/Worser/Worst Person in the World' segment, with an aim at eventually killing it altogether. What brought Olbermann to this decision? Jon Stewart, naturally!"

All kidding aside, Olbermann is a brilliant and well-read guy. I was excited when I heard he was going to bring his wit and erudition to news from sports. But he's just been a lefty Glenn Beck with a higher IQ. A douchebag.

"He's put his name alongside Lou Gehrig, Joe DiMaggio and Yogi Berra as the only players with two World Series-winning hits."

Lincecum had his backyard whiffle ball stuff dancing, and dat was da name o' dat tune.

The Giants started to attract everyone's attention in September, when their pitchers amassed a 1.78 ERA and held opponents to a .182 batting average.

Was September a fluke or were their pitchers really that good? Post season pitching: Matt Cain 3-0 0.00 ERA, Madison Bumgarner 2-0 2.18 ERA, Tim Lincecum 4-1 2.43 ERA, Brian Wilson 1-0 0.00 ERA 6 Saves. Among all those games, the only loss was to Doc Halladay, the best pitcher on the planet.

Overall, the Jints went 5-2 against the quartet of Cliff Lee, Roy Halladay, Roy Oswalt, and Cole Hamels. So imagine this: you pick up essentially the four best pitchers in baseball not already on the Giants roster and challenge the Giants to play seven games. Would you expect them to beat you 5-2? Well, that's how good they were! Damned good.

The strangely sad Giant: former Cy Young winner Barry Zito, who makes $18.5 million per year, and made 33 starts during the year, same as the Big Three. Zito started the season 7-2, then fell apart. He went 2-12 the rest of the way. In August we was 0-4 with a 7.76 ERA. When the Giants made the post-season, they told Zito to rest up for spring training.

"What exactly do we know about Mike Pflugenboom? Sure, Mike Pflugenboom says he is a small businessman. But who is pulling Mike Pflugenboom's strings? The Claxon-Ledger reports that Mike Pflugenboom has taken nearly $5000 in secret donations from Big Turnip and their foreign friends. Mike Pflugenboom -- too extreme for the 3rd District, too extreme for America. I'm Chuck Harbinson and I approve this message"

A perfect story to be covered by Craig Ferguson's robotic sidekick, Geoff Peterson, whose favorite line is "in your pants."

Craig's site is always posted much later than the other late night shows. He's always talking about the fact that he has no budget. I guess it's not a joke.

Managers always say shit like that whether it is true or not, but the guy just may be telling the truth. Celebrity journalism is notoriously unreliable, so the latest Charlie stories may be complete bullshit. It would certainly make more sense for Charlie to be keeping a low profile after his shenanigans last week, but I'm not sure that Charlie can be counted on to do the most sensible thing.

So flip a coin.

Guess which sport they were playing.

Actually, he's still alive and (kinda) healthy as I type this. I just wanted to scoop the internet.

"Dick has become depressed and disillusioned with Hollywood and has been going on massive booze and cocaine binges in recent weeks."

"Sheen has been partying in LA using MASSIVE amounts of cocaine while getting together with several hookers. Even the hookers have been amazed at Charlie’s behavior."

"Researchers rated alcohol the most dangerous substance based on the overall dangers to the individual and society as a whole"

The CBS contractor estimated the crowd at about 215,000, compared to 87,000 for the Back rally. Based on the amount of space covered by the rallies, the two estimates could not be accurately proportionate unless the crowd was 6.7 times more dense at the Stewart rally, and the author of this article finds that implausible.

In general, I agree with his points, but having just looked at the photos for both events, I think it is possible that the Stewart crowd was 6.7 times denser. But I have no "feel" for what a crowd would look like if its density were to increase seven-fold, so I'm not the guy to quote.

"November 1st marks the annual celebration of Dia de Los Muertos, or the Day of the Dead, where Mexican heritage says that we must honor the dead. So, in honor of this day of celebration, here's a list of insane people who have taken it a little too far."

I guess that the Pats will move to #1 in the power rankings because the two teams above them (Steelers, Jets) lost.

You can pretty much stick a fork in these teams which had Super Bowl aspirations before the season began: Vikings (2-5), Cowboys (1-6). Barely keeping themselves off that list: the Chargers, who avoided a sixth loss with a nice come-from-behind victory over the tough Titans.

Their kiddie battery was incredible. Posey had a homer and threw out a runner, but the real star was Bumgarner. I told you the kid could pitch. This is the guy who went 34-6 in the minors when he was barely out of high school. It's a monstrous victory because it forces the Rangers to win three in a row against the Giants Big Three. That's highly improbable.

Here's a story about Bumgarner from his home state's newspaper. (He pitched his high school team to the state baseball championship in 2007.)

Good story about a good kid. Real Americana. He's kinda from Hickory, North Carolina, but he actually hails from "... a tiny rural community in a rural agricultural county. “Bumtown” -- so named almost a century ago for all the Bumgarners living on both sides of Deal Mill Road -- is actually a mile northeast of Sawmills, four miles southeast of Hudson, three miles northeast of Granite Falls, three miles west of Oak Hill, nine miles south of Lenoir, four miles northwest of Dudley Shoals and 10 miles northwest of Hickory."