Name: Uncle Scoopy
Hero: Dalton
Movie: Road House
Drink: Dalton's drink, of course. "The Double Dews" - Mountain Dew and Dewar's
Professions: philosopher-prince and masked wrestler
Home: Vatican City, with a summer house in Parts Unknown
The Top 20 Nude Scenes of 2011
Top Nude Scenes of the Decade 2000-2009
It has been Britain's best-selling paper, and has been in operation continuously for 167 years.
It will be shut down in an unexpectedly dramatic response to the paper's involvement in illegal phone hacking.
The writer reveals that Gaga suffers from Lupus, is addicted to drugs and has an eating disorders. He claims that she is a walking time bomb and he plans to document all of the details surrounding her out-of-control lifestyle in his forthcoming book.
He has discovered a great deal of dirt during a series of investigative interviews: “Those who have worked with her on tour reported to me that Gaga barely ate for weeks at a time to fit into her costume.”
Halperin spent an entire year doing undercover research on the singer and he said she is “sick” and “obsessed” and has drug issues: “Her friends say that she has done every drug conceivable. You name it she has done it.”
Lady Gaga has openly admitted to battling Lupus but Haleprin’s research suggests that the disease affects her far more than she lets on: “Part of the reason she wears wigs and makeup is because her hair is falling out and she’s covered in red blotches, both side effects of the disease.”
"The good news for Lady Gaga is that celebrity journalist Ian Halperin never has any idea what the fuck he’s talking about. That’s not coincidence. I would trust what a ouija board had to say about Lady Gaga before I would anything from this dork."
He just hit the gorilla and ran. Some say he was just yellow.
But not for being naked on stage. That would have been OK. In fact, they were invited to an art festival by people who were well aware of the nature of their act.
The problem was that they stripped naked while in the outdoor audience of a music concert at the same festival (see the picture). Shocked concert-goers dialed 999.
"We didn't know they were performers. There was no stage or acting as such. We just thought they were very kinky nutcases," said one witness.
A police spokesman confirmed: "A group was detained for lewd conduct in a public place."
Bottom line: Jennifer Aniston was Katherine Heigl long before Heigl became herself.
I would love to have some spare time to compare Aniston's films to bin Laden's. I wonder which group would annoy me more. Probably Aniston's. Bin Laden merely wanted Death to America. Aniston actually represents it.
Having written that snarky crap, I now have to concede that I like what Aniston does on camera. She looks good and she can be very funny. But I sure don't like her choice of scripts. The ones they chose here are nowhere near her worst. One word: Leprechaun.
Here's what James Berardinelli wrote about that film:
"My feelings about Leprechaun can be summed up in one warning: no matter how starved you are for blood and gore, stay far away. This goes beyond simply being 'bad.' It's so unpleasant, in fact, that it isn't even worth a look as one of those popular 'so bad they're good' films. It is legitimately unwatchable. Jennifer Aniston shows that, in different circumstances, she might be competent, (but) the plot is a mishmash of cliches. The dialogue was written with the brain-dead viewer in mind. Regardless of whether you're Irish or not, if you venture into a theater showing this movie, your luck has run out."
"President Obama graciously offered to take questions submitted via Twitter today, courtesy the #AskObama hashtag. Being an inquisitive sort, I decided to submit a few that have been nagging me (I am on Twitter, by the way). Although he declined to answer any, I thought I'd warehouse them here in case he ever gets around to them."
Stay classy, lads!
"There are now more medical marijuana dispensaries in Denver than there are Starbucks."
Their goals:
1. We will eradicate glaucoma in our lifetime.
2. We don't remember goal #2, dude, but it was awesome.
"For someone who just got acquitted of murder, she's sure got some killer looks. The greatest part about the Casey Anthony case, or as I'm calling it the 'Racy Casey' case, is the fact that nobody believes she's innocent. Why? Because most of these pictures were taken after the death of her child since, naturally, what every reasonable person does after their baby dies is go out and party in sexy outfits for a few weeks/months. So, because I'm a terrible human being, here's a list of the sexiest near-nude Casey Anthony pictures. It includes pics of almost naked Casey Anothony's partying photos, mug shots, and just generally sexy pictures of Casey Anthony being hot. We're all going to hell."
This week will be the valley. Last week (Transformers) and next week (Harry Potter) represent the peaks.
There are two new movies, both comedies.
For the grown-ups (well, those 17 or older) there's the R-rated Horrible Bosses
For the family there's the latest from Kevin James, a PG film called Zookeeper.
No reviews at all.
Neither of these films have been pre-screened for critics. That used to be a really bad sign, but that's not really the case any more. The studios now realize that this sort of film rarely gets any kind of warm critical reception, so they have nothing to gain through advance reviews. I am sort of surprised that they haven't sent out a few advance screeners to selected "friendly" critics, just to get a little traction.
Transformers looks pretty safe for another week at #1. Even if it falls by 65%, that should still be more than the new films can muster.
Horrible Bosses is expected to pull in $28 million, which is actually pretty good for an R-rated comedy. Second place.
Zookeeper is expected to be right there in the same ballpark. 3rd place. $26 million.
Like him or hate him, he's interesting, and one of a kind.
Or two of a kind of you count his twin brother, who still shares his life.
Her mom is the veteran European screen goddess Ornella Muti.
It's 25 years late, but she still looks good.
It is exactly what it sounds like.
This is one of the questions philosophy has grappled with since time immemorial, whenever that was. Who are we? Why are we here? Do we continue in some fashion after we die? Should Canadians show their genitals? We now know the answer to the first three, but we may never resolve the fourth.
In a way, yes. He's always giving honest answers when he's expected to play the usual Hollywood game. You know the drill. "My movie is great. My director is a genius. My co-stars are brilliant actors and great human beings. Come to see this movie, if it takes your last dollar."
Of course it is kinda dumb for him to be telling the truth when it demeans his projects, because part of what they pay him for is to promote the product, not just to produce it. Therefore, doing what he does will get him less work and lower salaries, and that ain't too bright on his part, I guess. You would think he might have learned a little bit from watching his friend Megan Fox get fired from one project and ostracized from others.
But this controversy really tells you more about our culture than it does about Shia. C'mon, we all know that the last Indiana Jones film was a piece of crap, and that a typical Michael Bay film is nothing but a series of explosions, and can most charitably be called "mindless." Shia is describing them accurately.
So the accurate things Shia says are considered idiotic, and he would be considered much smarter if he would be inaccurate.
I swear our country has turned into the Bizarro World.
Have a safe and happy Fourth of July.
He has many, many YouTube vids for every band, as well as some history and trivia about each group.
The most important thing is to sterilize your power tools.
The headline is totally misleading and misses the entire legal point. (Hey, what would you expect from Fox News?) She would have been OK if she called the noodles too salty, because she tried them. She got into trouble because she claimed that the restaurant's cuisine was too salty (and unsanitary). The judge ruled that she couldn't draw such broad conclusions from trying one dish.
But it's still a funny headline!
Her boobs are much bigger than I remember.
"Duke was suddenly and surprisingly relieved of her Miss Sprint Cup duties late Wednesday night – and some inappropriate online photos from her days as a Clemson University student appear to have been the cause.
The web site CaptainThunderRacing.com posted the photos on Saturday. The graphic photos – apparently privately sent by Duke for private purposes – emerged on an anonymous message board earlier in the week, and users posted more pictures on Wednesday afternoon."
Transformers has already taken in $162 million counting its mid-week opening! The $97 million for the Fri-Sun period easily broke the previous Independence Day Weekend record of $88m, and became the top weekend of this year.
Larry Crowne took in only $13 million for the weekend, but that was just about double what Monte Carlo brought in.
Cars 2 tanked. It experienced a 62% drop, which was by far the worst second-week drop ever experienced by a Pixar film.
A good friend chronicles Hemingway's steadily deteriorating mental condition in those last months.
Hemingway's suicide was a shock to the world, but not to those who knew what he was like then.
Of course he was loose for three weeks before anyone noticed.
They figured he was a cast member of The Jersey Shore.
Yeah, you have to wonder about the value of talking to fish. Not to mention the boredom. You know how hard is is to talk to humans when you're stuck in an elevator? Imagine if you were stuck in there with a tank full of flounders.
"Michael Bay's 'Transformers: Dark of the Moon' is a visually ugly film with an incoherent plot, wooden characters and inane dialog. It provided me with one of the more unpleasant experiences I've had at the movies."
"The Avon Theater in Connecticut has posted a sign explaining it won’t give refunds to patrons dissatisfied with the film. "
"Deng gave his recruits military uniforms, had them parade in a Los Angeles suburb, and took them to the decommissioned USS Midway aircraft carrier, which is a museum in San Diego, authorities said."
