Sunday, December 24, 2017

December 25, Day of the Peruvian Christmas Fistfighting Festival

December 25, Day of the Peruvian Christmas Fistfighting Festival

With betting! And when a longshot wins, it's a Christmas miracle that you can take to the bank, which is much more useful than those sappy ones that were in your heart all along.

I thought that no holiday celebration could ever fill my heart like Giant Pink Japanese Penis Day or William Shatner's Birthday, but I'm starting to think I can make some room for the Peruvian XMas Fistfights. The boxers of Peru wish all men Peace on Earth and Goodwill - except for their opponents, of course, whom they just hope to beat to a bloody pulp.

By the way, this festival again shows the genius of Seinfeld and Larry David. Part of the purpose of the festival is (I swear this is true) "friends, rivals, and relatives square off to settle year-long disputes in an annual airing of grievances." So it's an airing of grievances and a test of strength. Yes, that's right, the Peruvians actually invented Festivus long ago!

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