The perfect defense: Trump lies all the time, so it doesn’t mean anything sinister when he lies about Russia

This is the position of the esteemed philosopher, ethicist and genius, Rick Santorum: “He lies about everything all of the time, so, what’s the difference?”

Now your first impression will be that Santorum is nuts, but if you think about it, you’ll realize Santorum is 100% correct. The liberals posit that since Trump lies constantly about Russia, he must have something to hide. Santorum counters that with impeccable logic: Trump lies about everything. He lies when he has something to hide, and he lies when he doesn’t. Therefore, since there is no correlation between his lies and his need to hide something, his lies about Russia imply nothing of the sort. They just represent Trump being Trump.

Some ignorant fool, clearly too weak-minded to understand Santorum’s flawless Aristotelian argumentation, responded, “Is that really the best defense you can come up with? ‘Well, he lies about everything.'”

But that is, in fact, a solid defense.

It’s not exactly a sterling endorsement of the character of the nation’s President, and it won’t inspire you to break into a rousing chorus of “Hail to the Chief,” but it is logically correct.

I’m not sure what Manziel did, but he has suddenly been banned from playing in the CFL.

“The league forced the Alouettes to cut him, then banned him from the entire CFL. In a statement on the matter, the league said Manziel ‘contravened the agreement which made him eligible to play in the league’ and that they ‘informed all of its clubs that it will not register a contract.’”

“The Alouettes said they were ‘disappointed’ by the CFL’s decision, also noting, ‘We worked with the league and presented alternatives to Johnny, who was unwilling to proceed.’ He had two years left on his contract when he was cut.”

“Don’t get discouraged when people tell you that you shouldn’t look at these pics or that you won’t gain anything useful from looking at pictures of Malia Obama rocking a bikini in Miami. These people live to make you as miserable as they are, and you shouldn’t spend another minute of your life worrying about what the right thing to do is. Just take a deep breath and remind the world that ‘Yes We Can’ look at these pics.”

Malia, by the way, has beautiful legs and a great booty.

From, dated April 3, 2017

“Michael Cohen, National Deputy Chairman

Mr. Cohen is currently the personal attorney to President Donald J. Trump. He served for more than a decade as Executive Vice President Special Counsel to President Trump at the Trump Organization and has sat on the boards of multiple Trump organizations, including Trump Productions, the Eric Trump Foundation, and the Miss Universe Organization. In addition to raising millions of dollars for his campaign, Mr. Cohen has been an active spokesperson and advisor for the President during his interest in seeking office since 2011.”