The petition is signed by such notable experts as Dr. Johnny Bananas, Dr. I.P. Freely, and Dr. Person Fakename.

Doctor Dwight Mannsburden was apparently not available.

The original investigation by Sky News revealed that the fake names were actually some of the more reputable signatories. At least they were doctors, albeit imaginary ones. The list also included every kind of quack, crank and self-professed expert you can imagine: homeopaths, massage therapists, hypnotists, and one guy who claims to cure disease through song.

From the comments: “Also on the list: Dr Harold Shipman. This one’s a legit physician and also one of the most prolific serial killers of all time.”

“The federal prosecutor appointed by Attorney General William P. Barr to review whether Obama-era officials improperly requested the identities of individuals whose names were redacted in intelligence documents has completed his work without finding any substantive wrongdoing, according to people familiar with the matter.”