Dave Barry’s 2020 Holiday Gift Guide

Sample of the list:

CRAPPING CATS WALL CALENDAR

$23.95 from Amazon.com (price may vary)

Here’s a tasteful gift that will add “a touch of class” to the home of anybody on your holiday gift list who, for whatever insane reason, likes cats. This item is — and here we will directly quote the eloquently descriptive words of the creator, Bo Winston — “a calendar of pooping cats.” It consists of 12 photos of cats pooping, “along with their names and country of origin.”