A Propos De Joan (2022) is the Citizen Kane of tentacle porn, featuring Florence Loiret Caille


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This is actually a mainstream French film starring the ever dour Isabelle Huppert. (Well, it’s mainstream by French standards, I suppose. In the USA it’s one of those films that would play in one arthouse theater in the East Village.) Florence Loiret Caille plays Huppert’s mother, who abandoned her to join her lover in Japan, which I suppose Huppert equates in her dreams with octopus fucking. I have not seen it, but based on the reviews, it appears to be the typical Huppert film about the futility and essential pointlessness of a completely accidental, joyless existence that must be endured until a lonely death.

Or as the French call it, a film de pop-corn.

It’s good to be the king. Or even the heir. Or even the spare. Harry can have the royal tailor make a custom codpiece for the ol’ duke dick, to keep it from getting damaged in a particularly bouncy fox hunt. Tally-ho to his tallywacker!

Here are more tales of Prince Harry’s frozen phallus, which gives new meaning to the phrase “cold cock.” “Hey, I was just minding my business in the arctic when I got cold-cocked. That explains my black eye. Oh, and also my petrified peter.”

I guess the shivering royal ramrod also gives new meaning to the phrase “a stiff dick.”

I wonder: Did Meghan get her tongue stuck to the polar pole, like that kid who licks the pole in A Christmas Story.

Given the new revelations about the Harry Canary, suffice it to say that the ginger prince has now joined yet another club for members only!