As is common in the world, war is brewing again - this time between ... Canada and Denmark, those warmongering bastards. Without reading the article, you just know that must have something to do with herring. Hell, I didn't even know Denmark had a warship.

On the 10th anniversary of his death, RollingStone.com remembers Cobain with his fans. In honor of their fallen leader, the Nirvana heads commemorated the anniversary by killing themselves after marrying a crazy blond skank. That made it a long day of marriage proposals for Sondra Locke, who eventually just left her phone off the hook.

As if Courtney Love didn't have enough problems - new book suggests Cobain didn't commit suicide.

The Traffic Cone Preservation Society

Bobby Brown is shooting a new reality TV series co-starring Whitney Houston.

The lone holdout juror in the case was named campaign manager for Ralph Nader" He praised her as "a first-class spoiler". But Mr. Nader’s announcement may have been overshadowed by the bizarre actions of defendant Kozlowski who, moments after the judge’s declaration of a mistrial, leapt to his feet and started chanting, “Toga, Toga, Toga!” (One of Borowitz's best columns.)

The strange things people believe about history. -- The Battle of the Bulge did not exist, but King Arthur did. Here's the really scary one: More than 60% thought the Battle of Helms Deep (in the Lord of the Rings trilogy) actually took place.

Here's the trailer for Jim Jarmusch's Coffee and Cigarettes

Britney Spears bosom popped out of her skimpy top in a semi-public performance. It was a wardrobe malfunction, chuckles the insider source. But unlike Janet Jackson's, no one was saying it was intentional. "The flashbulbs really went off." Spears rep didn't return calls for comment.

• I like the part about the flashbulbs. You KNOW that has to make the internet soon.

Computer goes haywire - 800,000 Cards Overcharged at Wal-Marts

The Shroud of Turin is real, dude! No, really.

Becks says he's purer than the Virgin Mary. "I've never even had sex with Posh, and my marriage is only to cover up the vow of celibacy I took when I became a Franciscan monk. The other lads would have a good laugh at my expense if they knew I'm a virgin."

The richest celebrities in England. Mostly Spice-related

Watch the uncut European trailer for The Girl Next Door

What are the odds? Injured Griffey misses opening day start with Reds. He injured himself by the strenuous exercise of running out a grounder.

Pulitzer winners announced. Other Crap snubbed..

A fearless President Bush stands facing the North Korean border, daring them to try something.

Alanis Morissette strips down in Canada to blast US "censorship". And yet she was wearing a body suit, because if she had really been naked, the Canadians would have censored her. Cue up "Isn't it ironic?"

The worst arcade on the planet!

I'm pretty sure you won't be seeing this segment on South Park. Cartman tells a bad taste joke.

Arena Football Cheerleaders - the Fly Girls, cheerleaders for the Shreveport Battle Wings

Pics from the set of Batman Begins

Judge Blocks Liquor Sale Ban at Ohio Nude Clubs. A proposed Ohio law to ban liquor sales at nude dance clubs was blocked by a federal judge April 1.

VH1 game show will test celebs' 'Gaydar': "VH1 is putting a 21st-century twist on 'To Tell the Truth.' Instead of guessing someone's occupation, a panel of celebrity guests will try to figure out whether a person is gay or straight. Yep, it's called 'Gaydar.'"

Brawl breaks out at anger management conference Whoda thunk it?

Spear Britney

The incredibly souped-up Penguin Smack. Hit the penguin, then watch a movie, and come back to see your results. If the Penguin has stopped bouncing.

Babe Ruth's bat comes out of the closet.

50 sporting things Englishmen must do before they die

The Padres' Jason Szuminski is a pretty smart relief pitcher, but no rocket scientist. Oh, wait a minute. My mistake. He actually IS a rocket scientist. He is the first big leaguer to graduate from MIT, and he's also an Air Force officer in his spare time.

A blast from the past. Carol Imhof was the Playmate in December of 1970. Here is her free, nude Playmate gallery, courtesy of PlayboyPlus.com!

Four free short videos from Playboy's Amateur Home Videos!

Sox sux. In each of the past 11 years, the Sox have started a different second baseman on opening day. Unfortunately, they would have lost even if Rogers fucking Hornsby had been at second today.

CNN.com - Crossfire Transcript with Al Franken and G. Gordon Liddy