“They found those that were moderately sized and had more volume in the area above the nipples — called ‘upper pole fullness’ — scored highest.”
So, scientists finally devised a scheme to see their first breasts! In the 1980s, Golan and Globus would have acquired the rights to this story.
Now let’s hear it for “Cocaine Crabs from Outer Space“
18 minutes ago, Mark Zuckerberg posted this mysterious number , check https://t.co/Y9r5wAFPIk pic.twitter.com/VD9B220bAV
— 𝚑𝚎𝚗𝚔 𝚟𝚊𝚗 𝚎𝚜𝚜 (@henkvaness) May 31, 2023
There are many possible uses of AI. Perhaps the dumbest, yet oddly also the most important, is to show us what young Christina Hendricks might have looked like naked.
“85-year-old man arrested for stealing condoms from convenience store”
“British daredevil sailor is forced to delay solo attempt to cross the Atlantic in a tiny 3ft boat after discovering his boat takes on water”
While that seems like a good enough reason for the delay, you’d think he might have tested that in advance.
“Mr Bedwell, who works as a yacht and sailmaker, plans to make modifications and relaunch the boat, which took three years to build and has a top speed of two-and-a-half miles per hour.”
“At press time, Target mandated that all employees should be drenched from head-to-toe”
That’s from The Onion, of course. If you don’t get the joke, it’s based on this.
While I have to give props to the headline writer for his choice of verbs, I have to note that same choice is misleading because the genitals in question are female. It’s the Giant Gold Thai Vulva, not to be confused with the Giant Pink Japanese Penis.
Not to be outdone by the headline creator, the staff writer referred to the gilded gash as a “holey” site.
Unfortunately, it is totally “woke” and oh, so self-important.
Check this out:
“She said her goal in creating the course was to use digital pornography as a jumping-off point to talk about race, ability, and the patriarchy.”
“Since the bun is covered in gold leaf, your fingers will be golden by the time you finish.”
“Summer is creeping up on us, and you know what that means: it’s time to whip out your Johnson. Sure your friends, your girl and your family might all enjoy and respect what you can do with your Johnson, but no one has the connection with it that you do. Your one-on-one time with your Johnson is pretty special. It may not be the biggest thing around and can occasionally be hard to handle, but it’s all about how you use it.”
The same study incorporated several measurements to determine the best and worst dog owners by city. Pittsburgh was the worst, Tucson the best.
I felt that if the universe really had a controlling intelligence, this would have happened in Davenport, during the sectionals.
But one commenter pointed out that the universe is not so ignorant, after all, since Ankara was part of the Ottoman Empire.
By the way, wasn’t “Flying Sofa Over Ankara” the sequel to “1001 Nights”? I remember there was a major kerfuffle among the set designers when the flying sofa clashed with the flying carpet.
Apologies. I guess those alleged jokes might have been sharper, but I couldn’t quite decide how to couch the observations.
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Clever, but not novel.
Orson Welles once used this trick to get out of phys ed.
Dickmobile? Peckermobile? Nah
“Minnesota man invents beer-powered motorcycle”
I hope he has room on his mantel for that Nobel!
They were actually singing the Latin phrase: “Vivat Regina Camilla,” which means “Love Live Queen Camilla”.
“Hamilton, of New Orleans, appeared less mobile than in her last failed bank robbery attempt, in 2014, when she offered a teller a note — ‘Put money in bag now!’ — at a Whitney National Bank branch on St. Claude Avenue. After the teller delayed, Hamilton left and was arrested trying to ride off on a bicycle, court records show.”