Other Crap

2009-07-04T23:59:00.000-05:00

Happy Fourth of July

America's birthday is normally a happy and festive occasion, but the gaiety is muted this year by the solemn funeral of Jeff Goldblum, whose tragic loss has saddened not just our country, but the entire world.
Especially New Zealand.

BBC NEWS | Americas | NFL star McNair found shot dead

2009-07-04T18:23:00.000-05:00

Former NFL star Steve McNair found shot dead

Houston Astros vs. San Francisco Giants - Box Score - July 04, 2009 - ESPN

2009-07-04T18:07:00.000-05:00

I guess Lincecum is for real, eh?

No runs allowed, three hits, nine Ks. The Giants pitching staff has thrown four shoutots in their last seven starts. Lincecum started two of those games, that Sadowski kid started the other two. The rest of their staff is The Big Unit, Barry Zito and Matt Cain. That is some sweet pitchin' right there. (Although Zito has been having his troubles.)

TalkRadio 790 KABC-AM - Los Angeles

2009-07-04T14:35:00.000-05:00

"Organizers of Michael Jackson's memorial said that in the first hour after ticket details were announced this morning, the website www.staplescenter.com had received more than 500 million hits."

They must have some serious server capacity. That would be the equivalent of about 12 billion hits per day - approximately twice the population of the earth.

Celebrity Grind: Lady Gaga Nipple Tape Pics

2009-07-04T14:11:00.000-05:00

Very Strange Lady Gaga Nipple Tape Pics

Daily Box Office for Friday, July 3, 2009

2009-07-04T13:30:00.000-05:00

Daily Box Office for Friday, July 3, 2009

As expected, it was a photo finish between Ice Age and Transformers. Transformers also passed Up and Star Trek to become the top film of the year so far.

YouTube - Robot Geisha Trailer

2009-07-04T10:29:00.000-05:00

Movie trailer o' the day: Robot Geisha. (Awesome!)

6 National Anthems That Will Make You Tremble With Fear | Cracked.com

2009-07-04T09:25:00.000-05:00

6 National Anthems That Will Make You Tremble With Fear

"On Independence Day, Americans are probably feeling something approaching national pride. So we thought we'd take a closer look at the national anthem, that creepy ritual of bland patriotism."

McKinney: I'm in jail in Israel | ajc.com

2009-07-04T09:20:00.000-05:00

Remember wacky congresswoman Cynthia McKinney? She's now in an Israeli prison.

2009-07-04T09:05:00.001-05:00

Michael Jackson's $25,000 Custom Casket

And poor Jeff Goldblum? Sawed in half and buried in a Hefty Lawn and Leaf bag.

Amsterdam considering bank help for prostitutes | Lifestyle | Reuters

2009-07-04T07:08:00.000-05:00

Like America, The Netherlands is considering a bail-out for its most important industry.

No, not tulips or marijuana. Prostitution!

The Himalayan Times - Swiss town erects giant plastic Michael Jackson - Detail News

2009-07-04T07:05:00.000-05:00

Swiss town erects giant plastic Michael Jackson

And yet, nothing for Jeff Goldblum! Not even a stinkin' cuckoo clock.
Regarding the statues, the organizer boasts: "There are just 19 of them in the world and two in Europe"

Daily Star: Simply The Best 7 Days A Week :: News :: Donkey kicks ass

2009-07-04T07:02:00.000-05:00

Eddie Murphy voted most lovable screen animal

Lady GaGa Does German FHM | Yes Bitch!

2009-07-04T06:57:00.000-05:00

Lady GaGa Does German FHM

Let’s Burst the Bubble by Mark Steyn on National Review Online

2009-07-04T04:14:00.000-05:00

American Republicans have much more boring sex scandals than British Tories

Literate, amusing article:
"In its heyday, Brit sex was about the action — Lord Lambton’s three-in-a-bed bi-racial sex romp; Harvey Proctor’s industrial-scale spanking of rent boys; Max Mosley’s Nazi bondage sessions, with a fine eye for historical accuracy and the orders barked out in surprisingly accurate German; Stephen Milligan’s accidental auto-erotic asphyxiation while lying on a kitchen table wearing fishnet stockings . . . With the exception of the last ill-fated foray, there was an insouciance to these remarkably specialized peccadilloes. By contrast, American sex scandals seem to be either minor campaign-finance infractions — the cheerless half-hearted affair with an aide — or, like Governor Sanford’s pitiful tale (at least as recounted at his press conference and as confirmed by the e-mails), a glimpse of loneliness and social isolation."

"We have the governor of South Carolina resorting to subterfuge worthy of one of those Mitteleuropean operettas where the Ruritanian princess disguises herself as a scullery maid to leave the castle by the back gate for an assignation with a dashing if impoverished hussar garbed as a stable lad. Perhaps some enterprising producer would like to option a Carolinian update of Prince Bob, the hit of the 1902 theatrical season in Budapest, in which the eponymous hero, a son of Queen Victoria, escapes 'the bubble' of Buckingham Palace by getting out on the streets and wooing a Cockney serving wench."

Report: Roger Clemens didn't test positive in 2003 - ESPN

2009-07-04T03:59:00.000-05:00

"Roger Clemens' lawyer says the pitcher was not among the more than 100 players who tested positive for performance-enhancing drugs in 2003."

Ya gotta love lawyers and their shenanigans. This statement, while true enough, is tantamount to a lawyer issuing a statement proving conclusively that his client couldn't have killed anyone on Tuesday, when in fact the client was accused of Monday and Wednesday murders. Clemens was never accused of using in 2003, and his mediocre performance indicates he probably was not. McNamee's accusations cover only two periods: (1) the second half of 1998; (2) the period from mid-2000 until the end of the 2001 season.
McNamee's testimony alleged that Clemens, after experiencing a rough start in 1998, was juiced in the second half of 1998, his last year with the Jays. Clemens is not accused of using steroids in 1999 or the first half of 2000, during which time he was with the Yankees, was separated from McNamee, and had a major decline in performance. McNamee joined Clemens in New York in mid-2000 and claims that Clemens was juicing again in the second half of 2000 and all of 2001. Whether that is true or not, Clemens did experience a tremendous resurgence. McNamee and Clemens were separated after 2001, and Clemens then had a major decline in performance. In 2001 the Rocket won the Cy. In the 2002-2003 era, he got no votes at all in the Cy balloting and had an ERA above 4.00 for the period.
I detailed Clemens' 1998-2001 performance and its correspondence to McNamee's accusations here.
The other suspicious period in Clemens' record is 2004-2005, when he had another spectacular comeback. After his two mediocre years at the end of his Yankee run, he went to Houston. First year there: 18-4, Cy Young. Second year there: 1.87 ERA at age 42! This period, however suspicious it may be, is not covered in the McNamee testimony, and nobody has stepped forward to make any accusations about that time, at least not so far as I know.

+Soil from the same ground where Michael Jackson DIED!+ - eBay (item 290328418308 end time Jul-09-09 01:00:31 PDT)

2009-07-04T02:16:00.000-05:00

Soil from the same ground where Michael Jackson DIED! - eBay item

"This is the last ground that Michael Jackson ever walked on! Perhaps his ghost is residing in this piece of earth!"
Current bids: none.

Lady GaGa Does V Magazine | Celebrity

2009-07-04T01:58:00.000-05:00

Lady GaGa Does V Magazine

Generally tame, but one image is slightly unsafe for work.

Has Julianne ever been outside - What Would Tyler Durden Do

2009-07-04T01:40:00.000-05:00

Julianne Moore goes outside for the first time in her life.

I wonder if she knows the word for "sun." Why isn't she on True Blood?

Comedians Mourn Palin's Resignation - Borowitz Report

2009-07-04T01:37:00.000-05:00

Comedians Mourn Palin's Resignation

"Moments after Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin announced her resignation from office, comedians from coast to coast held candlelight vigils to mourn what one comic called 'a devastating loss.'"

Detroit Tigers vs. Minnesota Twins - Box Score - July 03, 2009 - ESPN

2009-07-04T01:28:00.000-05:00

Detroit Tigers vs. Minnesota Twins - 16 innings

Helluva game. The Tigers went ahead with a run in the 14th, but the Twins matched it to keep the game going. Then the Tigers scored three in the 16th, but the Twins got a rally going and almost matched it again. They got Mauer and Morneau on second and third with one out, but the rest of the Twins line-up couldn't close the deal. Mauer scored on a ground-out, but a second grounder ended the game.

St. Louis Cardinals vs. Cincinnati Reds - Box Score - July 03, 2009 - ESPN

2009-07-04T01:23:00.000-05:00

Señor Sluggo beats the Reds by himself

The Reds held a 3-0 lead going into the eighth. Three runs? How could Pujols make that up by himself? When he needs a grand slam, he gets one. The Reds came back to get one in the bottom of eight, tying the score, so of course Pujols had to knock in another run the next inning.

RedLasso - Terrifying View from the Nation's Tallest Building

2009-07-03T15:51:00.000-05:00

Video: "The Sears Tower in Chicago has unveiled a new feature: 'the ledge'. This glass platform allows visitors to look nearly 1500 feet straight down."

Exclusive: Michael Jackson tried to adopt ‘Octomum’s’ Nadya Suleman’s eight babies as playmates for son Blanket just weeks before he died - mirror.co.uk

2009-07-03T15:31:00.000-05:00

British newspaper headline o' the day: Exclusive: "Michael Jackson tried to adopt ‘Octomum’s’ Nadya Suleman’s eight babies as playmates for son Blanket just weeks before he died."

Sarah Palin - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

2009-07-03T15:28:00.000-05:00

Deeply depressed by the death of Jeff Goldblum, Sarah Palin announced today that she would would resign as governor effective July 25 and would not seek reelection.

Goldblum died in New Zealand, which Palin can see from her back porch.