“Explaining that it was best to put him out of his misery as quickly as possible, local father and birthday party host Ian Klassen reportedly took an injured clown behind the bouncy house Friday to shoot him.”

“‘He immediately tried to get back up and start juggling, but collapsed as soon as he put weight on the leg. He’s been honking his nose in distress. The smile is painted on, but underneath all that makeup, you can see he’s in pain. Well, let’s get this over with, and then we can have cake.’ At press time, sources confirmed Klassen had handed the birthday boy the shotgun, saying it was his son’s birthday clown and his son’s responsibility.”

That will teach the kid to be a man!

“Miami-Dade County and the Miami Heat swiftly pulled out (pun intended) of their partnership with FTX, the erstwhile namesake of the downtown arena owned by the county.”

Could it be the BangBros Arena?

The Booby Trap Arena?

Scoopy Stadium has a nice ring to it, if Uncle Elon will buy those rights for me.

Stay tuned.

Soused Stepdad certainly has a very direct way of expressing himself. That’s his headline, not mine.

His expository prose on this post is equally candid:

“I’ll still look at the gash, you know because of the whole depressing porn aspect to it, and obviously my love for vagina in all shapes, sizes, age and level of biohazard.”

Along with “Svarovski” and “Vanity Fair,” here’s another word that always guarantees swanky bullshit: “Cartier.” The pic below is Australian model Roberta Pecoraro at a Cartier event in Sydney. I would never discourage a supermodel from wearing something that completely exposes her breasts, but I think she could have chosen more flattering options to accomplish that.

Click on the pic to get to a gallery.

image host

Carla Gugino is naked in the opening sequence of Leopard Skin. That’s the way to kick off a new show!


Episode 1 – Gugino skinny dips

image host image host

Then Amelia Eve shows part of her bottom

image host image host

Episode 2 – Rear nudity from Amelia Eve

image host

Episode 3 – Two different scenes with Gaite Jansen, who is a sure nominee for “nude performance of the year.”

image host image host image host image host image host image host image host image host image host image host

Episode 4 – Gugino skinny-dipping

(an expanded version of the opening credit scene).

image host

Then Jansen sunbathing again.

image host

Episode 5 – Jansen in a dark sex scene

image host

Then girl-girl action with Gugino and Jansen.

image host image host image host

Episode 6 – More sexy Gugino-Jansen shenanigans

image host image host

Then Eve sleepwalking

image host