Once again Brainscan takes a deep dive into a forgotten chapter in the history of film nudity: the grindhouse era. Except for the footnote, Brainscan alone created all the commentary and collages, as well as the myriad of film clips that accompany this article in the members’ version of the Fun House.

Grindhouse movies that claimed to show the nudist lifestyle did not start with Russ Meyer’s The Immoral Mr. Teas.  Pretty sure there are many more examples, but the earliest I have come across is a short from the 1940’s titled Lil From Brazil, which stars Margie Harrison, a future Playmate. (1)

But we can be sure the first nudist musical was Goldilocks and the Three Bares (1963).  The first half of the movie is a stage show captured on film with some dialogue about something and some singing about something else, but the second half is a nudist extravaganza with water skiing and yachting and horseback riding (yikes!).  That  second half starts with Allison Louise Downe getting into the correct attire for this nudist sort of thing.

and then proceeds to show her and maybe a dozen women posed so as to keep their furry bits hidden.

One BIG exception to that rule – no furry bits – is the scene in which Allison gets on her horse.  Shot from a distance, it nevertheless reveals parts of her that would rile any censor.

In the second of Allison’s clips you will see veteran nudist movie star, Dolores Carlos, in a swinging hammock.  That’s it – the sum total of her contribution to the movie, swinging topless, in a hammock, back and forth a half-dozen times.  Oscar-winning stuff.

One clip with neither hide nor hair of Allison is supposed to be funny, as some doofus in a fake mustache uses binoculars to spy on nudists five feet away from him.  Perhaps he was a dermatologist, in search of suspicious moles.  The actor playing this part has the subtle range of a warthog in heat.  Anyway, he spies Maria Stinger frolicking in a  nearby pool and thereby proving to one and all that she need never worry about drowning.

 

Maria was a glamour model for magazines of the time.

She was also a frequent sight to see in nudist movies, as you can see in the Funhouse archives, February 7, 2013, where you will find her in a legendary cinematic performance as nudist #3 in 1961’s Diary of a Nudist, as captured by Oz.

The credits say another veteran grindhouse actress, Ginger Hale (or Hall), appears as a nudist somewhere in this film but I’ll be darned if I can find her.  Truth be told, this movie almost broke me.  I gave up one evening after capturing images that were blah, just blah and despaired of finding a way to piece them together.  (Like random images of nudists by the pool.) The movie was no fun at all to watch and was hell to work with.  In a ten-tiered system of movie fun that ranges from Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade at the top and Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull at the bottom, this one sleeps with the Skull.

————–

(1. Scoop’s footnote: The otherwise obscure Margie Harrison is famous for one thing – her appearances in Playboy. To begin with, she became the FIRST Playmate when she appeared in the second-ever issue of the Bunny-oriented publication.  “First Playmate” is a trivia question that will win you many bar bets. Most people think Marilyn Monroe was the first Playmate. You all know that Marilyn appeared in Playboy #1, but the magazine never applied the term “Playmate” to her. MM was the “Sweetheart of the Month.”

Margie was also the first Playboy centerfold, because Marilyn had appeared in the main body of the  magazine.

Finally, Margie was also a two-time Playmate, as she graced both the January and June issues in 1954.)

 

Part 1 of this series, The Immoral Mr. Teas, can be found here

Part 2, Nudie Cuties and More, 1963-1965, can be found here.

Part 3, The Nudie Cuties of 1963, can be found here

to be continued …

 


 

If you enjoy Brainscan’s work, here are the other series that can be found on Other Crap:

The Films of Harry Novak

Part 1, The Sixties, can be found here.

Part 2, Hicksploitation, is here.

Part 3, The Seventies, is here.

Part 4, The Models in Print (and in his films), is here

 

The Early Years of Film Nudity

Part 1: 1932. Peak Pre-Code Talkies.

Part 2: 1929-1934. The Other Pre-Code Talkies.

Part 3: 1927. The Swan Song of the Silents.

Part 4: 1900-1926. The Silent Era.

Part 5: 1935-1951. The Dry Years.

Part 6: 1952-1959. Europe to the Rescue

The same articles, with the added bonus of all of Brainscan’s film clips, can be found in the members’s version of the Fun House, along with the many thousands of other collages, clips and commentaries that Brainscan has created in the past two decades. (And his contributions represent only a tiny fraction of the content in the back issues, since the Fun House has been updated every day, seven days a week, without exception, for the past 24 years.)

What Historical Figures Would Look Like Today

OK, it’s a dumb click-bait slideshow, but at least it’s interesting.

In other news, Caligula was actually either Frodo or Mark Zuckerberg. Here’s another example of Zuckerberg/Little Boots. Of course that’s unfair. You can’t compare Zuckerberg and Caligula. One of them was a cold, unsympathetic, nearly inhuman monster whose almost god-like power nearly destroyed western civilization. And the other was only a Roman emperor.

Once again Brainscan takes a deep dive into a forgotten chapter in the history of film nudity: the grindhouse era. Brainscan alone created all the commentary and collages, as well as the myriad of film clips that accompany this article in the members’ version of the Fun House.

1963 had two other nudie cutie movies. Bare Hunt was shot in black and white, and She Should Have Stayed in Bed was shot in color.

I had my doubts about the format of the She Should Have Stayed in Bed, so washed out was the color, until I got hold of the trailer.  This was one of Gigi Darlene’s first movies, which makes the miserable condition of the DVD border on the tragic. I used the DVD for the first two collages,

but then in the third collage you see The Goddess of All Things Grindhouse in
vivid color.  She was to die for as a blonde but as a redhead Gigi was off-scale.

She Should Have purports to show the viewpoint of a cameraman as he follows women around from one apartment to another, with a running gag about a wedding cake and a repeating performance of Audrey Campbell brushing her hair.

Through it all is the voice of he who is supposed to be the director, speaking lines written by the wife of the real-life director; they are amusing in the same sense that Tiger King’s comments at his husband’s funeral were.

A few other women revealed in their natural habitats are:

Alice Denham,

Davee Decker,

Monica Davis

and Terry More (decidedly not Terry Moore, once the wife of Howard Hughes).

I failed to recognize two other women, who have the longest scenes:

Unknown 1 is in the best scene of the movie, but I have no clue who she is.

And Unknown 2 is not only in the film

but also shows up in the trailer, so I grabbed a frame of her from it.

————–

Bare Hunt also uses voice over for most of its length, as a detective follows a trail of dead women who had been naked only moments before they met their maker. Not so much a whodunnit as a who gives a shit about it, the movie manages to reveal:

Jimmie Marcell (wearing pasties??!!!) in the beginning,

followed by Karen Moore,

Paulette Kire,

Sherry Holden

and Shirley Skiles

at an establishment called Myrtle’s Modeling.

Someone manages to slip a noose around Ms. Moore’s neck without her noticing anything amiss until the noose tightens, such is the magic of hemp.

The detective hangs out a pool with Marge London in a verrrryyy long photo shoot.

It all ends when he confronts Marilyn Savage, his secretary and serial murderess.

The scene with Ms. Savage is the only one shot with dialogue, and by the sound of it, the director set up a microphone in the kitchen but shot the scene in the living room.  Ms. Savage is a hoot to watch as she goes from enticing – y’all wouldn’t shoot little ol’ me because I am too sexy for my shirt – to seriously pissed off in less than a second.  She then runs out the door.  Roll credits.

This is what grind houses had to offer their customers in 1963, desperately awful movies for desperately horny men.  And the producers could get away with it because in the early 1960’s they had no competition.  All of that would change in the space of 5 years and when it did, grindhouse would become much more  interesting.

Part 1 of this series, The Immoral Mr. Teas, can be found here

Part 2, Nudie Cuties and More, 1963-1965, can be found here.

To be continued …

 


 

If you enjoy Brainscan’s work, here are the other series that can be found on Other Crap:

The Films of Harry Novak

Part 1, The Sixties, can be found here.

Part 2, Hicksploitation, is here.

Part 3, The Seventies, is here.

Part 4, The Models in Print (and in his films), is here

 

The Early Years of Film Nudity

Part 1: 1932. Peak Pre-Code Talkies.

Part 2: 1929-1934. The Other Pre-Code Talkies.

Part 3: 1927. The Swan Song of the Silents.

Part 4: 1900-1926. The Silent Era.

Part 5: 1935-1951. The Dry Years.

Part 6: 1952-1959. Europe to the Rescue

The same articles, with the added bonus of all of Brainscan’s film clips, can be found in the members’s version of the Fun House, along with the many thousands of other collages, clips and commentaries that Brainscan has created in the past two decades. (And his contributions represent only a tiny fraction of the content in the back issues, since the Fun House has been updated every day, seven days a week, without exception, for the past 24 years.)