May I offer a sincere thanks to that homely fat guy who is hugging a nearly naked Emily Ratajkowski. (Full gallery here)

I think that’s her husband, Sebastian Bear-McClard, who is an inspiration to all of us average-looking, out-of-shape galoots throughout the world, and now my personal hero, if not my deity.

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Recent and related:

E-rat full-frontal nudity

E-Rat checks to see whether her nipples are still there.

E-rat bootylicious

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I’m glad she tried something new. I was running out of dumb-ass suggestive comments about golf. We already know she has good ball-washing technique, and her lessons can really straighten out your putter. And we know she hates the rough stuff.

Now at last I can make a really dumb joke about another subject.

I wonder if she ever considered music. I really have some great organ material.

And don’t get me started on harpsichords.

All bad jokes aside, she is one fine-lookin’ woman.