“And so, class of 19, as you go forward to face a world which sometimes causes us to lose our vehicles in the oversized Disney parking lot of life, always ask yourself as you ask your friends, ‘Dude, where’s my car?'”

“Principal Kenny DeMoss gives closing remarks during 2019 graduation ceremony. Critics say DeMoss plagiarized a speech given by actor Ashton Kutcher in 2013.”

If you must plagiarize, choose from among the best: Shakespeare, Goethe, Pushkin, Kutcher …