Not to mention uncomfortable.

It gives new meaning to the word “prick” in sex acts.

Take it from me.

It’s as unpleasant as it sounds, but after my divorce and the death of all my pet skunks, porcupine-fucking was my only outlet. Thank heaven I was not in Florida at the time. I would have had to go to every one of their little dens and introduce myself as a porcupine-sex offender.

This website alleges that there are other unusual animal-related laws in Florida. For example, it is against the law in Miami for a man to force his wife to dress as a parrot. Florida women hate a parrot, which is weird because they love a cockatoo. Maybe three.