In the last three seasons he has played an average of three games per year. That’s not me fuckin’ witcha. That is the actual stat. The only thing he accomplished in those final three seasons was to lower his lifetime average from .300 to .299 by batting a sparkling .097 in 31 at bats.

In better days, he spent his entire career with the Red Sox. He was the AL rookie of the year in 2007, and won an MVP award in 2008, when he led the league in hits, doubles and runs scored. He never had another year that good, but he came close. For example, he had the highest WAR on the 2013 World Championship team.