“Deadly cobra vanishes during Missouri Venom Fest”

How could they possibly have seen that coming?

Here’s how I knew in advance that this could be a problem, and that I probably should not attend: the event is called “venom fest.”

Here’s a guideline for you:

Probably safe: jazz fest, folk fest, film fest, wine fest, Italian fest.

Probably avoid: venom fest, fist fest, guns and whisky fest