I was laid off from Twitter this afternoon. I was in charge of managing badge access to Twitter offices.
Elon just called me and asked if I could come back to help them regain access to HQ as they shut off all badges and accidentally locked themselves out.
— Alex Cohen (@anothercohen) November 18, 2022
Per the comments, this turned out to be a hoax.
This is a hoax. Unfortunately, as it’d be really funny.
It’s metaphorically true. And Elon’s whole amazing Twitter adventure has been hilarious, unless you think all billionaires are John Galt. They certainly do.
“Sure, but as a contractor I get paid $100,000/hr, minimum eight hours.”
Look, Elon is a billionaire. That means he is supremely excellent at running anything and everything. For example, it means he is undeniably superbly qualified to be President of the United States.
That is because he would run it like a business. That is how a government should be run. Everything should be run like a business – governments, hospitals, universities and schools of all kinds, space programs, churches, charities, families – everything. This is inarguable. It is beyond all question, so don’t even try. Just shut up about it.
Now, when it comes to Twitter, things like firing the guy with the keys to the building are meaningless. It all comes down to whether Elon makes money off of Twitter. And it is the duty of the government to see to it that he does. Twitter is too big to fail and that is the magic phrase that means John Q. Public has to make sure Elon comes out of the deal with a nice chunk of change. Call it “Bush the Younger’s Law”.
Thank god the Republicans in the House are now in a position to hold the government hostage until it ponies up. It’s what their party exists to do, and has been since the days of Saint Reagan and his Holy Tax Cut. And DON’T ARGUE, or you’re a socialist.
made my day, thx for that 🙂