Category: Entertainment

10 Songs With Hidden Meanings

UncleScoopy

One of them reminded me of an obscure news item from back in the day. Who remembers “Kenneth, what is the frequency?”

On October 4, 1986, while walking along Park Avenue to his New York apartment, CBS news anchor Dan Rather was attacked and punched from behind by a man who demanded to know “Kenneth, what is the frequency?”

In 1997, a TV critic writing in the New York Daily News solved the mystery, publishing a photo of the alleged assailant, William Tager, who received a 12.5-to-25-year prison sentence for killing NBC stagehand Campbell Montgomery outside The Today Show studio in 1994. Rather confirmed the story: “There’s no doubt in my mind that this is the person.” New York District Attorney Robert M. Morgenthau said “William Tager’s identity as the man who attacked Mr. Rather was established in the course of an investigation by my office.” Tager claimed he thought television networks were beaming signals into his brain. When he murdered the stagehand, Tager was trying to force his way into an NBC studio with a weapon, in order to find out the frequency the networks were using to attack him, so that he could block it.

I don’t think the significance of the name “Kenneth” has ever been determined.

Today is National Talk Like Shakespeare Day

UncleScoopy

And so too is tomorrow. And tomorrow creeps in this petty pace from day to day, to the last syllable of recorded time.

“Forsooth, and possibly even even fivesooth” 1, this is a proper holiday for me to celebrate, for like life itself, Other Crap is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

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1. A quote from the immortal Snagglepuss, who is making a comeback. If you’re not familiar with Mark Russell, he may be somebody to read about. His dark takes on the Bible, the Flintstones and Snagglepuss are well worth a quick look to see if they are to your taste.

No, it’s not the same Mark Russell who was the cut-rate Tom Lehrer 2. That was a guy you would see on PBS singing ditties about crap like the General Agreement on Tariffs and Trade, Uruguay Round. You had to love a song that rhymes “gave Uruguay” with Dave Garroway 3.

2. Tom Lehrer, on the other hand, was one of the true geniuses of the 20th century.

3. Dave Garroway was a mellow, bowtie-wearin’ mofo who was the first host of the Today show. He was so laid back that he made Perry Como seem like a coked-out lounge lizard. He often “co-hosted” with a chimpanzee named J. Fred Muggs. To this day, nobody knows exactly why Mr. Muggs was hired. Cynics say it was for ratings.

10 Famous Movies With Crazy Behind the Scenes Stories

UncleScoopy

Some interesting yarns. This is one I had not heard before:

“While looking for a tattered coat for the character playing The Wizard in the Wizard of Oz, a costume assistant bought one from a second hand store. When the actor put the coat on he turned the pocket inside out – written in the pocket was the name L. Frank Baum who is the author of The Wizard of Oz books. Baum’s widow later identified the coat as actually having belonged to her husband.”

Happy Giant Pink Japanese Penis Day, 2024

UncleScoopy

It is Giant Pink Japanese Penis Day in the Year of Our Shatner 93. Once again the world celebrates the event that has been described as “Mardi Gras with dongs.”

I hope that your family enjoys the traditional bird with all the trimmings. We always put a rooster into the oven at our house, but there’s never enough meat to go around because my brother-in-law always eats too much cock.

I also hope that you did your shopping early this year. I waited until the last minute, and the clerk at Walmart told me that they had no Giant Pink Japanese Penis Day gifts. I guess they must have sold like wildfire this year.

When you get right down to it, that’s not really important. Sure, kids of all ages enjoy the food and the presents, but amid all the merriment, we should never forget the true meaning of Giant Pink Japanese Day. As one commenter noted a few years back:

“Maybe Giant Pink Japanese Penis Day doesn’t come from a store.
Maybe Giant Pink Japanese Penis Day means a little bit more.”

Hemingway once wrote, “If you are lucky enough to have lived in Paris as a young man, then wherever you go for the rest of your life, it stays with you, for Paris is a moveable feast.” The same is true of Giant Pink Japanese Penis Day, for no matter where we roam, there is always a giant pink Japanese penis inside all of us.

————

Warnings:

(1) Do not be fooled by imitations. Some other countries have gotten penis envy and have instituted Giant Penis Days of their own. Beware. These are rip-offs, although some have memorable celebrations, like Giant Brown Swiss Penis Day, where a different giant chocolate penis comes out of a cuckoo clock every hour. Giant Green Irish Penis Day is right out.

(2) Do NOT try to smuggle giant pink penises into Japan from other countries. In addition to the fact that you would face the dire legal penalties for giant penis smuggling (imagine Midnight Express, except with giant penises), there are simply good reasons why you should not do so.

  • First of all, they would not be sacred. The official giant pink Japanese penises are the only ones that have been blessed. Bringing in a counterfeit would be like trying to pass off a bottle of Ozarka from 7-Eleven as Holy Water in the Vatican.
  • Second, the Most Honorable Japanese Department of Agriculture and Giant Genitalia is concerned that introducing a new strain of giant pink penises into their eco-system could cause the native strain to mutate or die out. It’s the same reason why you can’t take frogs to Australia.

The main thing to remember is that there is simply no need for you to take such a risk. There are plenty of giant pink Japanese penises to go around, and that means a fun day for one and all.

Count Floyd has died- Pretty scary, eh, kids?

UncleScoopy

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Aroooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Joe Flaherty through the years.

Joe’s hilarious impersonation of William F. Buckley Jr.

Variety’s obituary here.

Joe was the oldest member of the original SCTV cast. He was 82, about 13 years older than the youngest, Catherine O’Hara. He is the third member of the original SCTV cast (seen below) to pass, following John Candy and Harold Ramis. The four living members are Andrea Martin, Catherine O’Hara, Eugene Levy and Dave Thomas.

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Although SCTV was originally a Canadian show, that original cast featured three Americans: Ramis (Chicago), Martin (Portland, Maine) and Flaherty (Pittsburgh). That was the maximum allowed, because the rules prevalent at the time demanded that at least 50% of the performers had to be Canadian.

(Canadians Martin Short and Rick Moranis joined the cast later.)

Below, Joe Flaherty discusses the early days of SCTV with Jen Candy, John’s daughter. What a great, nostalgic visit with a charming man! When the hour was up, I wanted another two hours. I was deeply disappointed that Jen never got him on for a second appearance. (Curse you, pandemic.)


As Joe points out in that interview, he tool an unusual path toward Second City stardom. He was the classic late bloomer. After some college, the Air Force, and acting classes, he was already 28 when he joined Second City Chicago – as a stage manager! It was quite a while before he got to perform, and that happened only because the rest of the cast refused to work with Gerrit Graham on a road show, so Joe was plugged in as a desperation choice.

Which scene was picked by Reddit users as the greatest nude scene in history?

UncleScoopy

“In a recent Reddit thread, users offered thousands of different answers to the question, ‘What’s the best nude scene Hollywood has ever produced?'”

I’ll tell you numbers 2-6. Number one is a scene you might not expect.

2. True Detective
3. Total Recall (three breasts scene)
4. Fast Times
5. Boogie Nights
6. Wild Things

There can be only one.

RIP Louis Gossett Jr.

UncleScoopy

He was one of the great character actors, and one of the most enduring. His 200+ IMDb credits span 66 years, from TV’s B&W era to this past holiday season. (The Color Purple)

He won an Emmy for Roots by creating one of the most memorable characterizations in TV history. He won an Oscar and a Golden Globe for An Officer and a Gentleman, making him the first Black man to win the Best Supporting Actor Oscar. He won another Golden Globe for The Josephine Baker Story. He played historical characters as diverse as Anwar Sadat and Satchel Paige.

Variety’s detailed obit

Diane Lane and Amanda Plummer in Cattle Annie and Little Britches

UncleScoopy

This 1980 film is an old-fashioned Hollywood Western that glorifies outlaws and romanticizes the Wild West. It features the corny emoting of Old Hollywood legend Burt Lancaster, and you can fairly argue that it seems more like a 1955 movie than a 1980 effort, but I have to admit that I enjoyed setting my brain aside to watch this mindless whitewashing of the Doolan-Dalton gang.

Unfortunately, it’s a PG film, and the only nudity was from John Savage. Boo!

Amanda Plummer (Cattle Annie), who was 22 when the film was lensed in the summer of 1979, and future star Diane Lane (Little Britches), who was only 14, bathed in the river with the outlaw gang, but they stayed covered.


Plummer
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Lane

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Notes:

  • The real Cattle Annie was only 13 when she was captured, but Plummer looked young enough to play the part.
  • Plummer (Honey Bunny in Pulp Fiction) is the daughter of Tammy Grimes and the stage and screen icon, Christopher Plummer.
  • The real Cattle Annie, at least according to one version of the tale, lived until 1978! She was almost 96 when she passed.

Liam Neeson will be the new Frank Drebin

UncleScoopy

“Liam Neeson Won’t Imitate Leslie Nielsen in ‘Naked Gun’ Reboot”

Do you think Liam was chosen because he has the same initials?

More important, will the new Nordberg imitate O.J.? Does he have to do it offscreen as well? If so, I have a casting suggestion – is Oscar Pistorius out of jail yet? Wait! What am I saying? O.J. is out of jail. Time for his comeback.

The film will be produced by Seth MacFarlane. For reasons not known to me, David Zucker, whose team created the Naked Gun trilogy as well as the original Police Squad TV series, has been completely excluded from the development of the new one. Pat Proft, who co-wrote the Naked Gun trilogy, said: “I’m not pleased. It may come out and may be great — and good for that — but I sure as fuck should be writing it. I should have done this one.”

Lydia Fischer topless in the season seven premiere of Rentnercops

UncleScoopy

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This is a series about really, really old cops.

  • Remember when Danny Glover said, “I’m too old for this shit”? Well, he would have been about three decades too young for this shit.
  • Remember how old Abe Vigoda seemed as Detective Fish on Barney Miller? Either of these guys could be Fish’s dad.
  • Rentnercops are older than Shatnercops.
  • Remember when George Costanza fled the angry mob on a disability scooter? Well, he could easily have gotten away from a pursuit by these guys.

OK, I’m out of references. The title means “retired cops.” The premise is that staff shortages force two long-retired detectives back into action. If some scenes look too ridiculous for a crime show, I suppose that’s because IMDb bills the show as a crime comedy. Yeah, I know, it’s hard to tell with Germans. There are normally not that many laughs in an autopsy, but that is one zany nation! It’s almost as if Jim Carrey started his own race of people.

The entire episode is online for free. The nudity starts around 13:28. I give this episode a +2 on the Eurocrap scale.

Eurocrap Plusses:

“Seasons in the Sun” in German, right after the intro, starting at about the thirty second mark.

Death by crossbow in an office

Autopsy nudity

Eurocrap Minuses:

No green light in the autopsy room.

Claudia Peña topless in Road House (2024)

UncleScoopy

This is a remake of the legendary Patrick Swayze film from the 80s, this time starring Jake Gyllenhaal as Dalton. It follows the same general pitch-line as the original:

Thoughtful tough guy is hired to clean up a local bar terrorized by some thugs. The baddies are employed by a local plutocrat who wants to scare the roadhouse owner away for some greedy reason or another.

Gyllenhaal is an accomplished performer, and Doug Liman is the established, respected director of such films as The Bourne Identity, so the film is professional and workmanlike. The action set pieces are excellent and sometimes epic. The fight scenes are filmed and choreographed skillfully.

Unfortunately, this film lacks the subversive humor, the batshit-crazy characterization, the offbeat dialogue, and the generally loony originality of the Swayze version. Swayze’s Dalton was a confident, well-to-do Doctor of Philosophy, steeped in Zen thought, master of every one of the martial arts. He wore Armani suits and drove a top-of-the-line Mercedes. The new Dalton is a mopey, broke, guilt-ridden ex-fighter who travels by Greyhound bus and probably buys his clothes at Goodwill.

Yawn.

I wrote decades ago:

“Roadhouse is a cinema classic and one of the most entertaining movies ever made. I doubt whether making a great comedy was the original intention, but as gamblers say, “The cards speak for themselves.” It is the White Trash Hamlet; the Redneck Romeo and Juliet; Macbeth with a Mullet; Much Ado about NASCAR; Timon of Athens, Georgia.

The new Road House is not that at all. If the first version seemed to be written by a literate, half-mad carnival geek while watching a monster truck rally, the new one seems to be written by a marketing manager with good A.I. software and a copy of “How to Sell Your Generic Script.”

Or to put it another way – the new one was created by taking the original Road House and stripping away all the fun.

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The nudity is as lackluster as the script, again paling in comparison to the sexy original. By clipping a tiny section of the 4K version, I can produce this:


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But what you see as you watch the actual film is this:
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Yawn again.

Whatever happened to … Stepfanie Kramer?

UncleScoopy

If you’re like me, you probably had a crush on her at one time. The spectacularly beautiful actress was the co-star of the popular cop series, Hunter, in the mid- to late 80s.

I’m not sure why she popped into my head, but I wondered what happened to her post-Hunter career, and what she looks like now. She never really hit it big. Her movie career consisted of indies and made-for-TV throwaways, and her singing career just never took off. She re-emerged for the short-lived 2003 Hunter reboot, and still acts occasionally in episodic TV. Somehow I haven’t ever run across her since the original Hunter series, but she’s been out there all this time, plugging away.

She never did a nude scene. Her character had a sex scene in Beyond Suspicion, but the nudity was provided by a body double.

1984 and now:

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Here’s the Mel Brooks Oscars Acceptance Speech You Didn’t See on the Academy Awards Broadcast

UncleScoopy

Nathan Lane and Matthew Broderick, aka Bialystock and Bloom, presented his statue. Mel is literally older than the Oscars, and is as feisty as ever. Now THAT is a true showbiz legend, and he deserved to be part of the main broadcast.

Speaking of the Oscars, here is the full list of winners. Every one of the betting favorites won except Lily Gladstone. The “Best Actress” race was the only one where the odds were close, and it provided the only real nail-biter in an evening of foregone conclusions. In my opinion, Emma Stone did a better job with a more difficult role, but I have to admit I was rooting for Lily.

The best Kimmel gag of the night came after the show was finished: a very quick look at the dog from Anatomy of a Fall pissing on Matt Damon’s star on the Walk of Fame. I figured that Kimmel would get a Damon joke in there somewhere, but I thought he had blown a great chance in the last minute when every major Oppenheimer contributor was on the stage except Damon (who was not in attendance). I’m glad I didn’t turn the show off when Kimmel said goodnight.

Beer Ads Stitched Straight Into Original Star Wars Movies

UncleScoopy

“At first glance the clips could easily be taken as the work of a zealous Star Wars fan with a penchant for beer and a little too much time on their hands. However, against all odds, the ads appear to be real, as evidenced by legal documents spotted by Gizmodo Australia on the Chilean Consejo de Autorregulación y Etica Publicitaria (Self-Regulation and Advertising Ethics Council) website, which detailed Lucasfilm’s grievances with the campaign.”

They were produced back in 2003, but went viral this past week.

I understand why Lucasfilm is upset, but I think the two parties should figure out a way to settle, because these ads are kinda awesome and should resume.