Perhaps his deal with Satan has reached the expiration date?
This photo of Mitch McConnell's hands from yesterday pic.twitter.com/9x5x2UhxvJ
— MeidasTouch.com (@MeidasTouch) October 21, 2020
Category: WTF
Danish bull semen? I wish he had called. I could have sent him some. I have a whole refrigerator full, and I’d do just about anything for ol’ Jongie, my frat brother.
(Man that guy was tough when it came to rush week. Talk about hazing! Only the toughest pledges survived getting fed to his pigs. But all in all … best exchange student ever!)
Funny guy, awesome accent. Meryl Streep, step aside.
“The development marks the completion of a head-spinning 48 hours. Trump, on Tuesday, took to Twitter to call off the stimulus talks entirely, sending markets into a dive. Eight hours later he called for piecemeal legislation to address the economic hardship created by the coronavirus pandemic — something Democrats have repeatedly rejected. By Wednesday night, Mnuchin called Pelosi and said the President was interested in coming back to the table, according to a person familiar with their conversation. Now, the President is once again open to a bigger deal.”
“You read that correctly. We’re talking 65,000 seats. In the middle of a pandemic.“
Investigators probe ‘possible ecological catastrophe’ in Russia’s Kamchatka region
“Russian investigators said Saturday they were looking into “a possible ecological catastrophe” in the eastern Kamchatka region, after scores of dead sea creatures washed up in one of it bays and surfers reported burns to their eyes and throats.”
What more can go wrong this year?
It’s difficult to imagine anyone in the future looking back at 2020 with nostalgia.
And this was the best the hackers could come up with?
#Breaking: #PresidentTrump has transferred power to VP #Pence via a written declaration before being transferred to ICU in #WalterReedHospital, according to officials in Israel embassy in Washington.
— Israel Hayom English (@IsraelHayomEng) October 5, 2020
Gates says Trump was serious about making his then 34-year-old daughter his potential vice-president, returning to the theme and even carrying out public polling.
“We all knew Trump well enough to keep our mouths shut and not laugh. He went on: ‘She’s bright, she’s smart, she’s beautiful, and the people would love her!'”
Man ODs on a fatal dose of black licorice
Was it MURDER? Police are following a colorful pink and white trail of Good ‘n Plenty.
A new bronze statue of first lady Melania Trump was unveiled in Slovenia this week, after a wooden version of the memorial was burned in July. pic.twitter.com/0nVGXShV1E
— CBS News (@CBSNews) September 18, 2020
“I REEEALLLY think Netflix is wrong on this one. The streaming giant has supposedly given Harry and Meghan around $100,000,000 to create content that is hopeful and inspirational for their network.”
If the report is accurate, it does seem as if Netflix has lost its marbles.
…. and, according to them, that’s why they should not be released.
Based upon this novel legal theory, law enforcement should only be allowed to investigate the totally innocent, since any evidence exposing the guilty would cause them irreparable harm.
Oddly enough, all candidates for the presidency in modern history have released their returns and it caused them no harm of any kind. Gee, I wonder why Trump is so special.
“I prefer the sexual service, my clients do too”
For now, it’s just watching “Cabaret” on Blu-Ray.
“Malcolm MacDonald underwent a groundbreaking procedure to have a new one grown on his arm, before it could be grafted to his groin. However, medical delays have left the 45-year-old with the penis attached to his forearm for the last four years.”
ICE agents complain about Nazi comparisons, say they're only enforcing the laws https://t.co/sNtmzmyKfi
— Newsweek (@Newsweek) July 29, 2020
Only days ago, after asserting that “slavery was a necessary evil,” Tom Cotton was defending himself of against charges of being racist. Now, the Arkansas senator has found himself embroiled in yet another controversy after telling The Arkansas Democrat-Gazette that “the Holocaust was also a necessary evil.” Appearing earlier today on the Fox New Channel’s morning show Fox and Friends, Cotton justified his remarks, arguing that “absent the Holocaust, Israel would not be a country today.”
WTF? C’mon, Joe. Even with your history classes so many decades in the past, you must realize that is wrong. Hell, eight Presidents owned slaves while they were in the office of the presidency, and four others owned slaves at other times. Even the beloved FDR approved internment camps for Americans of Japanese heritage.
And then there were Andrew Jackson and Woodrow Wilson, two flagrant, unapologetic racists.
Trump may be the worst one since Wilson, although he has some competition even there, but he’s certainly not the first, and given the looming presence of Ol’ Hickory, Trump doesn’t even have a good claim to be the worst.
Rudy re-tweets a wacky conspiracy theory about Ilhan Omar somehow being a terrorist four years before she was born.
Can we get rest of this picture? https://t.co/19NG2Pmiey
— Rudy W. Giuliani (@RudyGiuliani) July 22, 2020
Per AP, which originated the photo:
“A woman recruit of the Somali Army checks her automatic weapon at a military training campus at Halane, Mogadishu, on Feb. 25, 1978. On the right is her instructor. President Siad Barre said at a news conference that regular Somali military units have not yet been dispatched in the Ogaden region to avoid international complications. (AP Photo)”
Omar was born in 1982.
To wit: “Kim tried to involuntarily commit me”
I like it!
And it gives Trump another slogan option as well. “Vote for Trump. Saner than the other guy.”
Kanye West has turned on his own family in the midst of what we’re told is a major bipolar episode … targeting Kris Jenner, comparing his life to the movie “Get Out” and accusing Kim Kardashian of trying to commit him to a mental hospital.
In a series of tweets Monday night, Kanye revealed his wife’s plan to get him help … just 24 hours after a bizarre and, at times, incoherent campaign rally in South Carolina. Kanye said, “Kim was trying to fly to Wyoming with a doctor to lock me up like on the movie Get Out because I cried about saving my daughters life yesterday.”
That was actually one of his more coherent assertions. Some of them are just full Nicholson in The Shining. Check this one out:
“I put my life on my God that Norths mom would never photograph her doing playboy and that’s on God. I’m at the ranch … come and get me.”
As it does every July 4, NPR tweeted the Declaration of Independence in multiple tweets. Elements on the right decided that they really do NOT like the principles that made America great.
“Over the course of four rambling hours of interviews on Tuesday, the billionaire rapper turned sneaker mogul revealed:”
- His party will be called the Birthday Party
- He has never voted
- “Planned Parenthoods have been placed inside cities by white supremacists to do the Devil’s work.”
- He’s suspicious of a coronavirus vaccine, terming vaccines “the mark of the beast.”
- He was sick with Covid-19 in February.
- He envisions a White House organizational model based on the secret country of Wakanda in Black Panther.
Fine ideas. I’m subscribing to his newsletter.
At last, a method to corral the stubborn China behemoth. No longer will the evil mandarins corrupt our precious national reserve of amateur dance videos performed by 11-year-old girls.
BREAKING: U.S. considers banning Chinese social media apps, including TikTok, Pompeo says – Fox/Reuters
— BNO News (@BNONews) July 7, 2020
West appears to have at least one vote secured. “You have my full support!” his pal, Elon Musk, tweeted.
Amid surge in Florida COVID-19 cases, Fla. Gov. DeSantis changed guidelines for ICU reporting. He doesn't want hospitals to report the number of patients in ICU beds. He only wants hospitals to report number of patients in ICU beds who require an “intensive level of care.”
— Daniel Uhlfelder (@DWUhlfelderLaw) June 22, 2020
Fuck those malingerers with the sniffles who just hang out for the Jello.
Also, he wants the burns unit to report only the patients with burns.
Attorney General William P. Barr will nominate Jay Clayton to serve as the new U.S. Attorney for the Southern District of New York.
There is a criminal investigation into Deutsche Bank currently occurring in SDNY. Deutsche Bank is Trump’s principal lender and possesses all of his financial data. Jay Clayton counted Deutsche Bank as a client and defended them in a massive money laundering scandal.
There is also an ongoing criminal investigation into Rudy Giuliani, which will presumably disappear when a Trump sycophant takes over the office.
So … usual corrupt shenanigans.
Except for one thing. The current guy did not actually step down!
BREAKING / NBC News: In a statement U.S. Attorney Geoffrey Berman says “I have not resigned, and have no intention of resigning.”
He says he found out he was “stepping down” by reading it in a press release.
— Tom Winter (@Tom_Winter) June 20, 2020
So … usual chaos.
UPDATE:
NOW: AG Barr says in a letter to Manhattan US Attorney Geoffrey Berman that Trump has now officially fired him, and that’s that, rejecting any argument by Berman that a judicial appointment means he can’t be removed.
Previously: https://t.co/3Kil8GKQQv pic.twitter.com/y1fkXsAFDC
— Zoe Tillman (@ZoeTillman) June 20, 2020
UPDATE #2:
Berman has cleaned out his desk. Barr and Berman seem to have reached a compromise. Berman’s trusted deputy will continue in the US Attorney position until the Senate can confirm a replacement. I assume the Democrats will delay the confirmation of Jay Clayton as long as possible
That Mittens! What a wimp, taking an anti-racism stance. Guy needs to man up if he wants to be a true, macho Republican.
To be fair to Mitt, maybe he’s just out of practice at kicking black asses. There just aren’t many to kick in Utah. Maybe he doesn’t even realize that some people aren’t white.
“Oh, dear, are they saying black LIVES, with a v. I thought they were talking about black LIES – you know, like little white lies and big black ones.”
Chris Cuomo apparently caught naked in wife Cristina’s yoga video
Well, on the Chris scale, I’d prefer Chris Evert, but better Cuomo than Chris Christie.
“44 percent (!!) of Republicans believe that Bill Gates is plotting to use a mass COVID-19 vaccination campaign as a pretext to implant microchips in billions of people and monitor their movements.”
This is incredibly dumb. There’s no need for a super-duper-top-secret-sci-fi implant to monitor your movements. Pretty much everyone has a cell phone.
So if a vaccination is developed, does this mean that all the people dumb enough to believe that idea will get the disease? This sounds like one of those rare cases where God and Darwin are in complete agreement.