"The Mayor of New York, his lesbian wife, whichever Cuomo is now Governor, and the new Ebola Czar got right on this situation by pretending to make important phone calls, mostly to one another. Obama vowed to cut back on U.S. funding for radio commercials in Western Africa encouraging people with bleeding eyes and calamitous diarrhea to visit America."
The most obvious flaw in his logic is that the press was laughing at Bristol Palin's ACCOUNT of her physical assault, not the supposed assault itself. It was Bristol that actually did the assaulting, and her version of the incident is a pack of self-serving lies that don't even make sense - and she wasn't even smart enough to come up with plausible lies. She seems unaware that there were MANY eyewitnesses to the "assault" who were interviewed by the police, and every single one (1) makes some sense; (2) directly contradicts her story.
Highlight #1- she says she was on her way to go beat up an elderly lady because the old coot pushed her 20-year-old sister. The way she put it, hilariously enough, "a grown woman pushed my little sister." Yeah, a 20-year-old needs a lot of help in the timeless struggle against evil grannies. And that was HER version of the story, post-spin. She's so clueless that even her spun version makes her look bad.
Highlight #2 - what about those six punches she threw, as reported by the homeowner and seen by many witnesses, at a guy who didn't retaliate with any physical force until he restrained her after approximately #6? Everyone else was lying! And then when the guy restrained her instead of volunteering to continue as her punching bag, SHE was the victim! (The police interviewed several eyewitnesses separately, all on tape, and they all told the exact same story. See the police reports below.)
Highlight #3 - the guy she was "assaulted" by - some guy she allegedly didn't know - was actually the homeowner, telling her to get the hell off his property. He asked Bristol Palin to leave and she responded, “Who the fuck are you?” Klingenmeyer told her he owned the home and Palin said she didn’t believe him and “will kick his ass.”
Highlight #4 - Bristol seemed to be drunk as a skunk in her interview, and her entire vocabulary seemed to consist of variations of "fuck."
* Track and Todd Palin were fighting each other as well as outsiders, because ... alcohol + rednecks =
* Todd Palin tried to continue the fight - right in front of the police officer during the investigation!
* Unlike Bristol, Track Palin actually was assaulted. He took off his shirt and challenged some guy to a fight because his sisters' honor was besmirched, whereupon a bunch of guys there jumped him and used their fists to besmirch the living shit out of him. You might argue that he brought that on himself, but at least he was actually injured and has a valid case for victimhood, unlike Bristol. Also, his version of the fight, while every bit as dumb, drunken and low-rent as Bristol's, at least rings true (not to mention homophobic).
Conservatives have a hard time understanding why liberals have such a superior attitude toward the Palins. I'll give you all a simple explanation: because liberals, and conservatives, and independents, and pretty much every other creature in the animal kingdom including slugs, ARE superior to the Palins. Liberals can disagree with, but can't really feel superior to, John McCain because he's a damned honest-to-goodness war hero. Liberals can't feel superior to Ted Cruz because he was the smartest guy at Harvard Law. But the Palins? Low-hanging fruit. If you don't feel superior to them, you have lower self-esteem than Wreck-It Ralph. They're like the cast of locals in Deliverance. They make Honey Boo-Boo's brood seem like the Glass family. They make the guys from Duck Dynasty seem like the Algonquin Round Table.
"A New York doctor who took the subway and went bowling in Brooklyn last night tested positive for Ebola today at New York's Bellevue hospital. Dr. Craig Spencer, 33, was reportedly working with Doctors Without Borders in Guinea before flying back to the U.S. last week."
Dude, that's pretty good entertainment by Canadian standards. Remember that Gordon Lightfoot has won the Juno award for best male Canadian artist three times. Now answer this question HONESTLY - would you rather listen to Gordon Lightfoot or white noise - considering that the noise will end in eight seconds, but Lightfoot will keep droning on about the Edmund Fitzgerald for about 186 verses.
"Oh sure, I stood in front of the cameras and said some words and stuff but, shit, that wasn’t really acting. Half the time I thought we were just getting the lighting levels and was there to save money and a stand in. Then I go to the premiere and there I am walking through a movie. I first got the idea when I was standing in front of Christian Bale during The Fighter and he was behaving really odd and afterwards someone told me that was acting. I thought I’m going to do this."