AI is evil, part ∞

Scoop, ... 38 comments.

Earlier today, Dr. Gumby brought to my attention that Johnny Moronic had covered a seldom-seen alternate cut of Alien Visitor (1996) that included quite a bit of extra nudity from Ullie Birve.

Here is an example of a brief but excellent scene. (Apparently only available in DVD quality.) In the cut seen more often, her lower body appears only momentarily in this scene, too briefly to see without the pause button. But you get a lingering look in this version. While the real clip is not the topic at hand here, we can’t fail to note that Ullie had a great figure. You have to love the way her large natural breasts bounce.

Anyway … I thought to ask AI for something way beyond my video editing capability – “Imagine this scene in daylight, with natural skin tones.” Here is the result. I have to stress here that this scene never existed. It is a complete fake, a product of pure AI invention, loosely based on the real scene above.

But it’s just about perfect. The only real flaw in it is that the guy, Syd Brisbane, speaks with an American accent. He’s really an Aussie, as you might guess from the unlikely name of Sydney Brisbane. The accent could have been fixed if I had given the proper instructions, but I had no idea the fuckin’ AI thing was going to invent dialogue.

I was skeptical of you prophets of AI doom, but you Cassandras are absolutely right. Your paranoia is not paranoia at all. It is merely a recognition of reality. In a year or two, we will have no idea whether an actress got naked. We won’t even know whether she was really in the movie with the other actors, or was just strolling around her back yard for images to be altered later and inserted into the movie’s context. Shit, I might put myself in Casablanca in place of Bogie!

Scary shit.

Say, I wonder if Sydney Brisbane’s middle name is Melbourne.

There is some nudity in Obsession (2026)

Scoop, ... 3 comments.

It’s a fairly original take on The Monkey’s Paw. Fulfilling one person’s wishes, especially when they involve another person’s free will, turns out to be tragic for everyone involved.

Look at these scores:

8.2 at IMDb
95% Tomatometer
95% Popcorn Meter

That’s not much lower than Schindler’s List!

After breaking the mysterious “One Wish Willow” to win his crush’s heart, a hopeless romantic gets exactly what he asked for. However, he soon discovers that some desires come at a dark and sinister price.

These captures are taken from a CAM.

The nudity comes from the character played by Megan Lawless, but as you can see, there is no way to identify who it actually is.


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The lead actress, Inde Navarrette, has a sex scene and some underwear scenes, but shows nothing. Maybe there is some areola visible here. Maybe not.


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(CAM) Videos. (Quality is below par.)

Nafessa Williams naked in Rivals (s2e2)

Scoop, ... 1 comment.

I just skimmed through this show for the nudity in season one, mainly because of time constraints, but I’ve actually watched the show this season, and I’ve found it to be a lot of fun. It reminds me a lot of the American series “Veep,” in that it functions simultaneously as a nighttime soap opera about politics, and a parody of the genre.

I had previously assumed that the poor camera work was an indication of incompetence. How many times can they just move the single camera rapidly from person to person for a chuckle? You can get dizzy watching the show. It finally got through my thick skill that it is also taking aim at a hackneyed UK comedy style, and that the tired sight gags, the corny musical cues, and the comedy cliches are part of the parody. It’s supposed to be dumb, and I’m enjoying how cleverly it pulls the whole thing off. Keeping the characters and stories credible on one level, but utterly silly on another, à la Veep, is not an easy thing to to, and the show navigates that minefield quite deftly.

Plus the stars get naked, and that’s increasingly rare these days.


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Video

Other nudity from this series.

A weird thing from IMDB …

Scoop, ... 16 comments.

There is a 2010 film called Dark Shields which virtually nobody has seen (no votes at IMDb, no external reviews).

But what caught my eye was the cast of characters. Check out the last name on the list.


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From the comments:

This begs a question, probably not the first time it’s been asked, where did “Uncle Scoopy” come from? My guess, you once owned a Baskin Robbins?

It’s Scoop, as in a news exclusive, not as in an ice cream shape.

Just before my internet days, I was wondering around the world doing marketing analysis for various oil companies. In my reports back to the office, my serious analyses and observations were always accompanied by the reports of a fictional reporter that I created, a certain N. Robert “Scoop” Parking who supposedly traveled with me, and told of his foreign experiences through his own eyes, those of an ignorant good ol’ boy from Texas. His first name was actually No. His momma named him No Parking so he would always have a sign designating his parking space, like a big shot. Of course he was from Texas, where a double first name is required by law, so No Robert Parking became “No Bob.” When he decided he was a famous travel correspondent, ala Charles Kuralt, he needed a more distinguished name than No Bob. After all, nobody called the other guy Chuckie Kuralt. So our boy became N. Robert Parking. He added “Scoop” because he was a reporter, and that sounded like a big-time reporter name, like in his dad’s old comics. (Scoop Scanlon worked as an investigative reporter for a newspaper called the Bulletin in DC comics during the late 1930s and early 1940s.)

So that’s how N. Robert Parking became “Scoop.” Because I played first base in my softball leagues, the name seemed appropriate for Greg as well, and it stuck.

When I started my first web page, I basically lifted the name of the Fun House as a play on, and tribute to, a TV special called “Uncle Andy’s Funhouse” (Andy Kaufman), the obvious direct inspiration for Uncle Scoopy’s Fun House. That was the first time that “Scoop” had undergone the metamorphosis to “Scoopy,” and it happened only because it fit the meter in place of “Andy.”

In the first year or so, the Fun House was written by Scoop Parking in his character voice, but people have a difficult time with that kind of parody. They think that the things said ironically, in the words of a character you’re making fun of, are what you truly believe. Even Stephen Colbert had a problem with this on his old show, when he would get inundated with mail and comments from people who really believed he was an ignorant, right-wing bigot. And I don’t don’t have the fame or subtlety of Stephen Colbert, so I just decided to drop the character voice and write as me. The old persona was soon forgotten, and I’m guessing that nobody reading these words even remembers those days, but the moniker endured.

The Scoop, like the Dude, abides.

House of Ashur update

Scoop, ... 20 comments.

Google’s AI bot says:

As of now, House of Ashur has not been officially renewed for a second season by Starz, despite high ratings [92% on Rotten Tomatoes] and a “resounding success” in viewership. However, creator Steven S. DeKnight has already written the entirety of a potential Season 2 and is highly optimistic about its return.

If the show is a “resounding success” in both viewership and critical success, what is the hold-up? Give DeKnight his money and let him go nuts. (I actually wrote to Starz to add my voice to those hoping for another season. I don’t think I’ve ever done anything like that before.)

Who is the best director who never received an Oscar or a nomination for one?

Scoop, ... 10 comments.

A subject that came up in another thread.

I concluded that is it between Paul Verhoeven and Sergio Leone.

(Howard Hawks and Godard received honorary Oscars. If you worded the question a little differently – “The best director never nominated for an Oscar” – then Verhoeven and Leone are in a heated battle with Godard.)

Any others?

From the comments:

Brian De Palma could be added in the list. Rob Reiner would be on the list of having won one for producing A Few Good Men but he was never nominated for any others.

and

Terry Gilliam has one nomination for adapted screenplay, zero noms for directing

and

Bryan Singer?

and

John Carpenter

and

Hard to pick a single director but on a short list, I’d include Sergio Leone and Brian de Palma (and maybe John Frankenheimer). If non-directing Oscars/ noms don’t invalidate a person, I’d include Sam Peckinpah and Tim Burton.

—–

On the other side of the equation – Who is the worst director who was nominated for an Oscar?

I asked ChatGPT, and the response was:

If you want the harshest cinephile answer, the names most often mocked as “how did they get nominated?” are probably Stephen Daldry, Tom Hooper and Lee Daniels

I think that French dude who directed Emilia Perez should get some kind of special recognition for winning Best Director for a film rated 5.3 at IMDb.

Various naked women, including director Julie Olgaard in The Angel Maker (2023)

Scoop, ... no comments.

Julie R. Ølgaard starred in, co-wrote and co-directed this grisly Danish noir about the pursuit of a serial killer.

Some spoilers:

Policewoman Laura (Julie R. Ølgaard), who specializes in cyber crime, suffers from psychosis. As a result, she is not only suspended from duty indefinitely, but also has massive problems in her marriage. Nevertheless, her computer skills are needed in the hunt for a killer who murdered a woman in an extremely sadistic manner. After another, almost identical murder soon occurs, she and her partner find important clues and recognize the connections. They realize that The perpetrator is a serial killer intent on punishing women who have had abortions. The closer Laura gets to solving the case, the more she realizes that her own abortion history could turn her from hunter to hunted.

Bella Norup

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Carla Clausen

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Julie Ølgaard

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Linnea Olivia Belfrage

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Videos. WARNING: Very unpleasant material.

Elle Fanning in a thong bikini in the season finale of Margo’s Got Money Troubles

Scoop, ... 7 comments.

The series has already been renewed for a second season, but I don’t know whether they have a dramatic fulcrum that justifies one. The first season was a nice, tidy, self-contained story with a full resolution.

This situation reminds me of the first season of Californication, which was perfect, therefore earning more seasons. But the writers basically had to create a new series from scratch, because that season was a nice, tidy, self-contained story with a full resolution. Oh, the rest of the series was fine, but it was never the same.

There are lots of series where I can’t wait to see that they do with what they’ve created: House of Ashur and Pluribus come to mind. But in this case, I feel the characters are solid, and the cast is super, but the story is finished, so yeah, I’ll give the second season a try, but I would not have been disappointed if the series had been canceled.


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Videos

Here’s my best guess at what the image looks like without the funky strip club lighting:


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Previous episodes can be found here.