Pam Anderson (almost) naked in Barb Wire (1996)

Perhaps the worst pitch for a movie ever: “How about a futuristic remake of Casablanca with Pam Anderson in the Bogart Role?”

Here’s what I wrote about it at the time:

This comic book film is rated in the all-time Bottom 100 at IMDb, and is not likely to spur much interest in the discussion panels at Sundance and NYU, but you may enjoy Barb Wire if the premise (stated above) appeals to your inner child, or at least to your inner douchebag.

The DVD contains “extra sexy footage not seen in theaters”, which means this: “Oops. We made a movie with Pam Anderson and forgot to show much of her jumbo, store-bought hooters. Nobody will buy this DVD for the story and the acting, so let’s add some irrelevant footage of Pam dancing topless while her hyper-inflated funbags are being sprayed with an oily liquid.”

Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

Ingmar Bergman was going to do the same thing in The Seventh Seal, but his casting director accidentally hired Bibi Andersson instead of Pam, and the checks were already cut, so they excised the medieval trapeze strip from the script at the last minute. Bergman has often remarked that he would have hired Pam except for the fact that the movie was made ten years before she was born.