Two words: Pia Zadora! The Lonely Lady is now available in 1080hd!

UPDATED with info from the comments section.

The early 80’s were the era of Zadoramania! For a couple of years there, she was Johnny Carson’s favorite punchline.

Pia was chosen as the “worst actress of the eighties” by the Razzie voters, and that was an amazing accomplishment because she did not achieve that dishonor through a spate of consistently awful performances throughout the decade, nor did she achieve it with an eleventh hour 1989 stinker that was still fresh in the voters’ memories. She did it all with two performances from early in the decade: her jailbait/incest performance in Butterfly, and her incredible “I fucked my way to the top” speech in The Lonely Lady. She basically disappeared from view after The Lonely lady, but that speech, this performance, and this movie were all so bad that even her seven years in hiding were not sufficient time for the Razzie voters to forget her by the end of the decade.

The Lonely Lady was nominated for eleven Razzies in 1983. That represented 110% of the highest possible number, because they only had ten categories. It won six Razzies, a record at the time, including all the important ones: worst film, worst director, and worst screenplay. Two decades later it was still regarded highly (lowly) enough to be entered into the elite group nominated as the Razzie’s “worst drama of our first 25 years.” Battlefield Earth was the winner, and the other nominees were Mommie Dearest, Showgirls, and Swept Away. Impressive company, indeed.

Pia couldn’t act, but she was a pretty good singer, and had a decent musical career in the 90s and beyond. She is now 65 years old and living her life outside of showbiz. It has occasionally been a turbulent life. Wikipedia tells the story.

From the comment section:

“This isn’t exactly how I recall the phenomenon of Zadoramania. I’d say it wasn’t because of her speech, her performance, or her two terrible movies that Pia Z became a national laughingstock overnight. It was all due to her winning the 1982 Golden Globe award for “Newcomer of the Year in a Motion Picture”. Even though her no movie starring her had not even been released yet. (Yes, she’d appeared 18 years earlier as a 9-year-old in a Santa Clause film, but nothing after that). The only thing she had done that had attracted any notice at the time of the 1982 Golden Globe Awards had been appearing in Playboy (without revealing much) a few months before. And yet there she was on national television beating out Elizabeth McGovern (for Ragtime), Rachel Ward (Sharkey’s Machine), Howard Rollins (the star of Ragtime), and most incredibly Kathleen Turner in her iconic and career-defining performance in Body Heat! Beating them, as I say, for a performance in a movie that had had no commercial release yet but had only been screened in Vegas by her casino-owning producer/husband. Now this was a story. One that garnered national attention, some outrage, and became a mini-scandal. What I am saying is that this scandal gave far more attention to Pia Zadora than either of her film appearances, no matter how bad those films and her performances admittedly are.

So great was the stink of this award that the Wikipedia list of Golden Globe winners now simply says for 1982, that there was “no award”. Pia has been erased from history!”

Scoop’s response:

Yes, that is completely correct, except for the erasure from history. I’ve told the same back story elsewhere. My point this time was that people had not forgotten their outrage and general contempt eight years later, even after she had melted into the oblivion she deserved.

The thing about her being expunged from history is just Wikipedia’s usual dipshittery. Obviously some contributor disapproved of her, and the editors responsible for that page were too lazy to fact-check. The HFPA still lists her as their 1982 winner.

As for the movie, my (far too) detailed comments appear after the jump. (If interested, click on “continue reading.”)


Continue reading “Pia Zadora in The Lonely Lady”

In the same sense that I am “essentially” as sexy as George Clooney.

Related: Trump’s most unhinged comments of the day

From the comments section:

Actually the Orange Buffoon’s most unhinged remarks were in his little mini-seminar on the relationship of Russia, Afghanistan and the USSR.

“Russia used to be the Soviet Union. Afghanistan made it Russia, because they went bankrupt fighting in Afghanistan. Russia. … The reason Russia was in Afghanistan was because terrorists were going into Russia. They were right to be there. The problem is, it was a tough fight. And literally they went bankrupt; they went into being called Russia again, as opposed to the Soviet Union. You know, a lot of these places you’re reading about now are no longer part of Russia, because of Afghanistan”

Wow. Where do you start? As Kelly Bundy might say, “It wobbles the mind!”

I’m not opposed to border security, and a high wall may make sense in some remote areas, but Beto is right about that stretch along the Rio Grande

First, much of the land on our side is owned by private landowners, each of whom would have to be subjected to eminent domain processes. Eminent domain can be challenged in court. Not only could that be a long, dragged-out process, but if even one challenger wins, there would be a big opening in the wall! And the USA can’t just take a narrow strip of land like a railroad path. There has to be room on the river side for flood control, repairs and patrols. There also has to be room on the other side for patrols and repair crews. There will have to be a second wall built by any ranchers that have livestock in order to keep them out of the strip of federal land, and out of the way of border officers making their rounds. (That may or may not be at government expense. The ranchers and the state of Texas may have to build their own barriers from the newly-formed federal territory.)

Second, the actual border between the USA and Mexico is in the middle of the river. Therefore, any immigrants who cross the river would have reached USA territory before they get to the wall, and could then claim asylum, and/or deliver an anchor baby without even reaching the border wall! Therefore, border patrol officers would have to patrol the river side of the wall as well as the area beyond the wall.

I very much doubt that anything will ever be built there, and if it is, it will probably be far in the future.

And even if it does happen, it will cause more problems than it solves.